Dec 2, 2022 7:00 AM

Heat Up the Holidays With the Best Sexy Gifts for Lovers

The best presents are the ones you can share—or the gift of self-care. Our favorite vibrators, lube, and candles will make this holiday one to remember.

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Featured in this article

Hands holding a match and lighting Burn No.1 candle by Maude

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I’m here to say we should normalize giving sex toys as gifts. Not just to your partner, but to your friends! Masturbation is potent self-care, so gifting a sensual toy or two is just like giving someone a scented candle or some luxury bath salts. It’s a gift to say “you deserve to relax.” Even if they’re given in jest, sex toys often make thoughtful and welcome gifts. We picked the products on this list with that in mind, whether you’re buying for a friend, a partner, or even a parent, each one is a different way to offer a loved one a new path to self-care.

Please note that this list is totally body-agnostic. We have toys for every kind of genitalia below. For more suggestions, don’t forget to check out our full list of the Best Sex Toys for Every Body, as well as the rest of our holiday gift guides.

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Photograph: Maude
Every Bedroom Needs a Good Vibrator
Maude Drop
One of the things I like most about this vibrator—besides the fact that it’s super cute—is just how wide the range of vibration intensity is. It goes from a soft little whisper of a buzz to an absolute hurricane of vibrations. That makes it a great toy for a variety of body parts, partners, and uses. It's a jack-of-all-trades for spicy bedroom time.
$49 at Sephora
$49 at Maude
$42 at Bloomingdale's
Photograph: Lelo
A Suction Toy to Spice Things Up
Lelo Sona 2 Cruise
Lelo's Sona 2 Cruise is a suction toy, meaning it uses a little mouth to produce the suction and tapping sensation provided during oral sex. It's a very different kind of sex toy than the traditional vibrator. It's small, discreet, can be as gentle or as intense as you like, and provides a kind of stimulation that's still pretty new to a lot of people. That makes it a great gift for anyone in your life, but especially a friend or lover who is curious about suction toys.
The cruise part of the name refers to Lelo's Cruise Control technology—which makes the toy ramp up intensity when you press it hard against your body.
$119 at Lelo
$139 at Verishop
$149 at Target

Photograph: Maude
A Candle That Melts Into Massage Oil
Maude Burn No. 1 Massage Candle
Another favorite from Maude is the Burn No. 1 candle. Like any candle, it’s atmospheric and romantic on its own. But this little guy has a secret: It melts into massage oil. Just light it and pour the melted oil into your hands or directly on your partner’s back (from a safe height). It’s a fun little bit of holiday spice, and it’s discreet enough to sit out in the open.
$30 at Maude (4 Ounces)
$18 at Sephora (2 Ounces)
$18 at Nordstrom (2 Ounces)
Photograph: Kindred Black
A Display-Worthy Glass Toy
Kindred Black Violet Duchess Glass Dildo
Glass sex toys are nothing new but they can be intimidating if you're new to them. After all, glass is usually fragile. This glass isn't. It's tempered, superhard, but body-safe and nonporous as well. That makes them really easy to clean (just hand or dish soap will do the trick). Glass toys like these feel like an elegant way to spend some time with yourself, and since it's just a glass shaft there are no batteries you need to worry about. Paired with any lube on this list they make for a truly wonderful time in the bedroom. It is, however, not flared, so it's not safe for anal use.
The other nice thing about glass toys like the Violet Duchess is that they look as great on a shelf as they do on your nightstand.
$95 at Kindred Black

Photograph: Dame
An Approachable Handheld Vibrator
Dame Pom Flexible Vibrator
I will never be able to sing enough praise for Dame’s Pom vibrator (8/10, WIRED Recommends). This little handheld vibe isn’t just powerful, it’s gorgeous and intuitively designed. It has the power you’d expect from a bullet vibe, but the added silicone body diffuses the vibrations through a broad area for a really unique experience. Not only is it easy to hold and operate one-handed, it fits neatly in the palm of most hands. All the buttons are right where your fingers land naturally.
$99 at Dame
$99 at Amazon
Photograph: Tenga
Thrilling Textures for Couples
Tenga Crysta Leaf
Tenga’s Crysta Leaf is a strong counterargument to the idea that sex toys for phallus-owners need to be crass and uncreative. It's not a “fleshlight.” In fact, it's hard to even tell it’s a sex toy when it’s sitting on your nightstand. It’s a clear, squishy, silicone-gel sleeve with a textured interior. When coupled with water-based lube, it’s an amazing experience—one that’s very easy (and rewarding) to share with a partner or enjoy by yourself. It’s the gift that keeps on giving!
$35 at Amazon
$39 at Tenga

Photograph: Kindred Black
A Sensual Sculpture
Kindred Black Brancusi Piccino Obsidian Phallus
Obsidian might seem like a weird choice of material for a sex toy, but it's just naturally occurring tempered glass. It's as durable, body safe, and nonporous as a traditional glass toy. This one in particular feels extra sturdy; it's pretty heavy. That heft is part of its charm though. Paired with any good lube, the Brancusi gets super slippery and it's very fun to play with. Additionally, its heft and craftsmanship make it a good gift for anyone interested in sensual artwork—or just a good glass dildo.
Since it's shaped like a phallus, it has a flared base that makes it safe for anal use. But I'd still advise caution because glass can get extremely slick with silicone or water-based lubes. Being nonporous, cleaning and disinfecting is super easy. It's just a matter of thoroughly washing with hand or dish soap.
$185 at Kindred Black
Photograph: Mysteryvibe
Versatile Vibrator for Flexible Fun
MysteryVibe Crescendo 2 Flexible Vibrator + App
This one’s a bit spendier than the other items on this list, but it’s worth it. MysteryVibe’s Crescendo is a flexible, bendable vibrator with six separate motors, all of which can be customized and controlled from its included app. Setting it up, getting the app paired, and experimenting with vibration patterns can be a fun exercise for couples.
The additional motors add a new level of stimulation to the standard vibration patterns. Instead of just one motor buzzing away somewhere inside a silicone body, the Crescendo’s motors switch on and off seamlessly, moving a vibration pattern up and down the body of the toy.
$209 at MysteryVibe
$223 at Amazon

Photograph: Jambys
Performance (In)active Wear
Jambys Pajama Shorts
What's sexier than being comfy? Jambys’ pajama shorts are super soft, stretchy, and great for all genders. They provide a flattering and adorable fit, no matter your body shape or type. Unlike just wearing a pair of boxer shorts, Jambys are designed to be a bit thicker, a bit more durable, and a hell of a lot more comfortable. They're made from ultra-soft modal cotton, and they even have nice deep pockets. Jambys also makes sweatpants and T-shirts that are every bit as comfy and cozy.
$35 at Amazon
$38 at Jambys
Photograph: Bananapants
A Special Vibrator for Couples
Bananapants Bumpher Vibrating Cushion
As a person with a vulva, wearing a harness is tons of fun. But sometimes it’d be nice to have a little stimulation too. That’s where the Bumpher comes in. It’s a vibrating cushion that attaches to the end of most dildos, so it’s compatible with just about every harness and strap. It’s designed to provide vibration for the penetrative party in couple play, and it does that job very well.
$36 at Amazon
$35 at Banana Pants

Photograph: Lovehoney
A Harness for Couple Play
Lovehoney Unisex Harness Briefs
No matter your genitalia, sometimes it’s fun for you or a partner to use a harness. Traditional straps can be intimidating and uncomfortable—all buckles and belts and metal. But Lovehoney’s Unisex Harness looks and wears just like a pair of briefs. Just slide the dildo into the solid O-ring in the front-facing pocket. It’s discreet, comfy to wear, and fits a wide variety of bodies—and it works great with the Bumpher (see above), for extra stimulation.
$35 at Amazon
$35 at Lovehoney
Photograph: Maude
Water-Based Lube
Maude Shine Organic Water-Based Lube
Nothing will change your intimate time quite like a high-quality personal lube. Yes, even when you’re by yourself. It’s not a failing to “need” lube for sex, and a good water-based lube will work great with all toys too. It can be used for all kinds of internal and external play and can be used with any of the items on this list. Maude’s Shine lube is my favorite overall. It comes in a cute, modern bottle, with a pump on top for easy access, and it lasts longer than you’d think.
$26 at Amazon (8 Ounce)
$18 at Sephora (4 Ounce)
$18 at Maude (4 Ounce)

Jaina Rodriguez Grey is a product writer and reviewer at WIRED covering coffee, sex tech, and gaming. Previously, she was a legal researcher for Thomson Reuters and a tech reporter for Digital Trends. She currently resides in Portland, Oregon, with her partner and a pet rabbit named Lola.

Writer and Reviewer

TopicsShopping sex gift guides