Be gentle with yourself

Neither are fixing the root cause of the problem. You are only putting a band-aid on a leaky faucet. The same can be said of supplements. There are probably more commercials for supplements than there are for knee sleeves or braces. But once I discovered this technique, it really helped calm me. Beauty bonus: As well as getting you to relax, deep breathing affects blood circulation and the oxygenation of your cells, including those in your skin. And all cells need a steady stream of oxygen to keep them alive, deliver nutrition, and do their job properly. PROGRESSIVE RELAXATION Do you feel like you carry tension in your neck and shoulders? If so, you'll be happy to discover progressive relaxation, which is a great way to relieve muscle tension caused by stress. Take off your shoes and loosen any tight clothing. Lie flat on the floor with your feet slightly apart and your arms by your sides, palms up. Cover yourself with a cozy blanket, if you like. Become conscious of your breath. May you guide us in better phone boundaries May our commitment to ourselves be rooted in looking away from the bright light of the screen and into the bright light of ourselves May we put the phone down when we want to May we pick it back up when we are ready Good spirit please take away my worry of FOMO Please help me see that the right now in front of me is all the magic I have ever dreamt of, and if it is not lead me back to my commitments and my practice to better do thy will, thy will of looking away from the goddamn phone

Whether it's from the part about phones in How to Not Always Be Working or my zine about the pains of social media, it is no mystery that I am a garden-variety phone addict. I have tried so many different things, and it can be so sad to not be able to control it, even when you try to put limits on yourself. So I wanted to share an experience I had working on this phenomenon of mind, body, and spirit that has me trapped. I suffer from a spine pain that is generally a psychosomatic result of holding on to emotions, feelings, trauma, etc I generally work with craniosacral practitioners to alleviate this pain and get to the source. You're just not a priority! I personally avoid the use of I can't when I'm not talking about physical limitations, even in conversations with other people, just to keep in practice; If you're like me, as soon as you make a habit of saying or thinking what you really mean instead of I can't, you'll find yourself much more conscious of what is most important to you and what your priorities are. If you're declining to do someone a favor because of a previous commitment, then it's not that you can't drive him to the airport, it's that it's important to you to keep your previous commitment. The underlying belief here that I'd like to strengthen in you is this: I can do just about anything if I choose to make it a high enough priority and devote enough time, money, and energy to it. Sometimes people say I can't because they believe there are some things they would have to do, if it weren't for the fact that they can't. Wow--double self-deceit! Suppose I tell myself I can't work on my article this afternoon because I have to go pick up the car from the repair shop. Let's go through it step-by-step. Up another level was my mom's bedroom, my sister's bedroom and the spare room. In later years that room became Mom's sewing room, spilling over with fabrics. Mom was a skilled seamstress. But for a time, when I was sixteen, this was where Alison stayed. According to author Gary Chapman, there are five love languages: quality time, physical touch, acts of service, words of affirmation, and gift-giving. Chapman argues that people in a romantic relationship relate to their partners primarily through one of these languages.

The idea of having a love language resonates with me, but I take a little licence and extend it--well beyond the limits of those five languages as defined by Chapman and also beyond the confines of romance. I believe a person's love language can take any number of forms; I also think that it rules the way we relate to all the people in our lives that we care about--family, friends, even colleagues--not just a life partner. My own love language is kindness. While my actions weren't always a direct correlation to his, I lived as if they were. I equated safety with value and love and consequently saw my choices as the only measure of my worth. I thought I needed to be the perfect daughter, student, and friend in order to matter. I tried so hard to be enough, but my dad didn't stop telling me how to be better. I remember feeling so worthless as a kid, not understanding why he thought I should have blond hair instead of brown, why my straight A's were expected and not celebrated, or why he and my mom were so unhappy. Naturally, I assumed that I was the problem, that I wasn't trying hard enough or being perfect enough to make our home a happy place. The feeling of inadequacy was overwhelming and seeped into my other relationships too. I was every teacher's favorite student. I did my homework early and without a single mistake. I was the most dependable line leader and class monitor and scored in the ninety-ninth percentile on every standardized test I took. Adia: My husband leaves for work and I and I am left alone to deal with the baby Fear, Surprise, Love Resentful, Abandoned , Doting (John and Gross, 2004) Why It Works: Recent research has shown that if we are able to label our emotions in more complex and precise terms, we can regulate these emotions more effectively. Increasing and using a more precise emotional vocabulary shifts our brains from the simplistic, black-and-white expressions of emotions like good and bad or sad and happy, and enables us to have a more nuanced response. Emotional Regulation Strategies

Researchers have identified four main strategies that enhance our ability to regulate our emotional responses in distressing situations, which we can remember with the acronym TANS: T hought restructuring A cceptance N ormalizing Their crazy schedules have me creating such detailed calendars that I feel like their secretary. On top of this, I run an online fitness company, and of course, I have my everyday obligations to cook, do laundry, shop for food, clean the house, help with homework, and be nice (sometimes that's the most challenging). I'm pulled in so many different directions that finding enough time for myself, let alone to write for three solid hours, became almost impossible. I often found myself staring at a blank article wondering if it really was worth it to find thirty minutes to type while the potatoes were boiling or asking myself if I should bother my arse to research protein synthesis for the fifteen minutes while I waited for my kids at the dentist. Already feeling at maximum capacity, plus menopausing the crap out of my life, I felt a whole new level of stress and disappointment during this writing process. I'm sure that many of you feel equally stressed out. One of the reasons midlife has been so closely associated with crisis is that many women start to have feelings of exhaustion, boredom, or unhappiness at this stage in their life. Even if women are doing something that previously gave them a sense of happiness and fulfillment, they might feel the desire to try something new or different, but life is just so busy that it seems impossible. Then throw in the craziness of menopause, and it's no wonder that women feel that they are permanently at war with themselves, their life, and those around them. Might it be that you, too, are simply trying to keep too many balls in the air? They took eight rats and put them in a cage with a pool of water at the bottom. The rats could keep dry by standing on a metal disk. But as soon as they showed signs of falling asleep, the disk would rotate, so they had to scamper to stop falling into the water. Within a few days, the sleep-deprived rats had swollen paws, and were losing their balance and starting to lose weight. Within a few weeks, they were all dead. Yet when they were dissected, no obvious cause of death was found.

Sleep deprivation has been widely used as a form of torture but, as far as I know, no equivalent of the rat study has ever been done on humans. Thanks to an unfortunate Italian family, however, we have a good idea about what happens when humans are deprived of sleep for a long time. It isn't pretty. The story begins in the early 1970s when an Italian physician, Dr Ignazio Roiter, living in a small town in northern Italy, was asked by his wife, Elisabetta, to examine her aunt. This project will demonstrate the difference between focusing on activities and splitting your attention. Projects, work, and even games are more successful when they have an individual's undivided attention. The brain cannot concentrate on multiple things at once, without sacrificing accuracy. Observatio n The exercises in this article will encourage improvement in children's observational skills. Fun games and activities challenge little ones to pay attention to their surroundings. Awareness is a useful skill, both inside and outside of the self. Children will learn to notice details that they may have never seen before inside everyday scenes. You will guide your participants on a journey to discover the world around them, down to the smallest details. Kids learn best through exploration, and you will be their guide. If you can't consume fish products for other reasons, then oils such as coconut, flaxseed, and olive will also come in handy because they are also high in omega-3 fatty acids. Certain yogurts, soy beverages, juice, eggs, and nuts will have some form of omega-3s as well and are very easy to include in your diet. Many people often get confused about what omega supplements to take because there are many with different variations. After all, there are also omega-6 and omega-9 fatty acids. This may seem confusing, but fortunately, research has found that omega-3 fatty acids can convert into omega-6 and omega-9 fatty acids if the body requires these acids. It is important to note, however, that omega-6 and omega-9 fatty acids are not able to convert lower to omega-3.