Monday 19 October 2020

Unconditionally loving

Before defining what mental models means, let's take some time to consider why scholars often argue that two heads are better than one. Indeed, this is something that people have lived to acknowledge and that it has defined how they interact with others. When debating something with other people, the higher the number of folks debating the better. This is because there is a good chance that a solid decision will be made based on different thoughts, assumptions, and experiences brought together. In one way of explaining, we create suffering by innocently believing that we are something separate from anything else. Fear is a highly accurate and responsive indicator to remind us that we can begin to experience joy in this exact moment. In particular, when it seems that fear is not at all helpful, it is indeed at its most helpful. When you do what you fear, you come to live a life that you love. When you love your every fear as your guide, friend, and teacher, you remain in that glorious life that you love. What a beautiful way to go home. As it feels right to you, I invite you to give yourself some time to take a quick inventory. Observe a corresponding gauge of your inner state. Notice your breathing. As a reflection of your current state, you will find that the more peace you experience right now, the more regular, deeper, natural, and slower your breath. It let us give up gradually the ability to stay with people in name of needs. We stay with them in the name of pleasure. Only one successful decision to change, only one successful new balance within your polarities can grant some kind of shared pleasure, it will be enough to let you feel how powerful your change can be. This is the only necessary initiative on our part: choose and shared pleasure What about external limitations? All those feelings of panic, insecurity, obligation, all the bonds that have brought us here are still out there waiting for us and have not accepted that we want to change, that we want to heal yet.

One of the things that most frightens us when we want to change is the reaction of other people who will take action to hinder, criticize, deride, or attack our desire for change. In a perfect world, it shouldn't be like this, everyone should be free to change how and whenever they want. But let's be honest; If people important to us decide to change they could get out of our control and they could get away from us. Kids were taking Benadryl and Ativan to keep them calm because the nurses knew they would miss the targets. They knew they would hurt them, and they hated doing that, but they simply weren't trained to do any better, especially with a child. This was a vicious cycle because every time Amanda needed to be admitted as an inpatient, we had to go through the ER system. With children with cancer, most of the time they're there because their blood levels drop so low, they have no white blood cells, and you can't have a child in that condition walking down the street. They have to be admitted. It was horrible. We had to initiate change ourselves, and that's exactly what I did by reaching out to Bard. They flew me to Utah where I met with thirty engineers. I told them my story in full detail, and by the time I finished, they were sobbing. Lorraine, we're going to fix this. The fact is that when people are taken individually, they are limited by their own experiences. It is for this very reason that we usually conclude that two heads are better than one. Now, the varying areas of expertise that people boast of leads to mental models. Interestingly, these are assets that we all have, but we often fail to realize it. The way we think is usually a product of the views and perceptions that we have in our community. People don't think out of concepts that they have invented on their own.

Instead, our thoughts are shaped by shared views, norms and perceptions of our community. These shared views provide people with a way of understanding the world around them. Accordingly, you will rarely find folks questioning shared views that are accepted by the majority. A good example of how mental models are formulated is through the perception that parents should provide mental stimulation to their kids. If you are thinking of something, holding any tension, or lacking complete peace, the rhythm and cadence of your breath will reflect that effort by becoming appropriately shallower, more irregular, or perhaps, it will pause completely. PHYSICAL AND MENTAL If you prefer (or fear) to take on physical challenges, I wholeheartedly invite you to chase your every fear. I recommend you consider participating in physical challenges that scare you, especially if you believe that you have a tendency to live in your head. For example, are you afraid to get out of bed in the morning even though there is no real threat to your doing so? I invite you to consider testing that fear by sitting up and placing the body you are in outside of the bed. Fear relies on an imagined future. It makes sense that the imagination would be helpful in dissolving fear in the imaginary future. Chasing fear as a written or spoken investigation can be very powerful and effective. As philosophers, theologians, psychologists, researchers, and children around the world can tell us, stepping into our imagination, practicing visualization, or doing make believe can seem as real, effective, and convincing as physical reality. We know perfectly well what others are talking about because as codependents we can be masters of the control of others if we want. In any case, having learned to correctly understand the meaning of our resistance and that of others in the face of important changes such as that of one's own identity, allows us to remove any feeling of fear from all this. If you have chosen to change you can do it in peace with yourself, if you have chosen to change, now you know how to interpret the protests of people who want to block your change process and even in front of them, you can be at peace with yourself. If you have chosen to change, it means that you have permitted yourself to stop controlling others and that you have taken away others to control you. If you have chosen to love yourself, it means that you have chosen to love even those parts of you that do not want to heal, those parts that you will have to embrace more strongly to transmit the courage they need. The rest is up to you and has to do with believing that when we set a journey with knowledge of the facts, serenity, assertiveness, and love, the rest of the world helps us to reach our destination, especially if we make them understand that we sincerely need help.

When you take a step forward, the providence gives it with you. If you believe it, your body is there with you, eager to start functioning well and to accompany you in your new life. Healing and Self-Demanding And finally, we dedicate a fair space to self-demanding during a process of healing and self-help. For the next couple of years, I met with the engineers doing 3D printing to figure out how it could work and how to make it. It took a long time. Then it went to the FDA, and holy moly, those people took forever. Like, get a real life, please. This is plastic; It's not rocket science. It may not appear like a tricky thing, but every phase required taking the prototype to a nursing and oncology conference, and having a hundred nurses test it out. A lot of research goes into every detail because you can't develop something and have nurses say they don't want to use it. You need to get them to be a part of the process. They really need to know that this product will make their life easier, which the Amanda Needle does. In this case, most societies will expect parents to play their role by taking good care of their children. Therefore, this is a world view and can be identified as a mental model. Using this example, people tend to relate with each other peacefully based on such similar views. For you to make better decisions, it is imperative that you comprehend what other people think. Arguably, your behaviors will be celebrated in society only if you conform to the shared views. When people express empathy toward each other, it shows that they understand each other better.

In a way, empathy shows that people not only understand how you are from the outside, but they empathize with how you feel from the inside. Therefore, it goes beyond knowing what a certain individual expects from you. Mental models give you the opportunity to comprehend people's thought processes and their deepest motivations. In addition, the models also give you insight into the emotional landscape that people are operating on. SOUL-LIBERATING FEAR Soul-liberating fears are not born from instinctual knowledge, such as having the common sense to not get in the way of an angry person coming at you with a closed fist or a weapon. Self-protection comes out of an apparent preference that you would rather not have the experience of getting hit, stabbed, or shot. Unless you are trying to stop a gunman from killing other people, it does not sound very loving to yourself or the other person to be putting yourself in harm's way. Nor does it sound like much fun. You do not need to seek out dangerous situations or someone with apparent malicious intent to harm you. I am not encouraging you to seek out situations where there is a high likelihood for physical pain just for the sake of testing your fear of that person or situation. Rather, a soul-liberating fear is a fear that seems to discourage your ultimate well-being. A soul-liberating fear is a fear that is somehow attempting to be counterproductive or limiting to the soul in keeping it a conceived identity. In other words, a soul-liberating fear is one that, left unchecked, actually fortifies or strengthens the ego-mind attachment. Is it useful to be self-demanding during healing? In our age, we often listen that today everything changes and changes very quickly so our need for change must be seen as important and urgent and must have priority in our agendas. This has a great fund of truth: We live in a changing world and if we want to change and we have chosen to do it, why should we hold on? We will make a few mistakes anyway, regardless if we start today, in a week or a month but the sooner we start the sooner we heal. True, but this cannot mean that during the change process we will have to act in a hurry that could turn us into self-demanding attitudes. The beauty of self-help is to be able to manage decisions and times with ourselves and to be proud of every improvement achieved autonomously or in parallel with the support of our therapist.

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