Father's Day is really challenging for so many people.
Demi Lovato knows all about it, and they shared their conflicted feelings about the holiday on Instagram.
"Trying not to wake up sad... Trying to stay positive. Today is always so difficult," they wrote. "This is for anyone else who's lost a father, can't be with their dad, didn't know their dad, or anyone who has a tough relationship with their dad."
"I spent many years on this holiday wondering whether or not I should call him... take it from me, if you can, make the call."
"Some days I regret not calling but other days I'm proud of myself for holding my boundary because I was doing what was best for me and my mental health. It's complicated, and I wish it were different but this made me into the person I am today," they continued.
"Anyway, my heart goes out to the people still holding their boundaries as well."
Then they shared four throwback pictures — three with their late father, Patrick Lovato, and one with their step-father. The first three included snippets of their song "Butterfly."
They wrote out the lyrics, "Your lying taught me bout honesty, honesty / Your leaving gave me my loyalty, loyalty."
And then they shared some more lyrics. "You were never really graceful / Now you're just what you're supposed to be."
The last picture they shared was of their stepdad, Eddie De La Garza. "(My favorite pic of us together, just left the Baltimore aquarium, I think, one day before tour)," they wrote. "To the man who raised me, I love you so much. Thank you @eddie.delagarza. Happy Father's Day, dad."
According to Entertainment Tonight, Demi has written many songs about their birth father, including "Butterfly" and "Father."
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And Demi has spoken about their complicated relationship in the past.
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"I was very conflicted when he passed, because he was abusive," they said in a 2015 video about the song "Father." "He was mean, but he wanted to be a good person."
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"And he wanted to have his family, and when my mom married my stepdad, he still had this huge heart where he would say, ‘I’m so glad that Eddie's taking care of you and doing the job that I wish I could do.'"
"He wasn't capable of raising a family and it was because of his mental illness. To know that it wasn't fully his fault really was saddening to me," they said.
After Patrick Lovato died in 2013, Demi created the Lovato Treatment Scholarship Program in his honor, to assist others like him.
