David Ostrom has been “destroyed legally” by his ex-wife and her attorney, he wrote in court filings. Now he wants to take them on in a different kind of battle: sword fighting.
He noted that trial by combat “has never been explicitly banned or restricted as a right in these United States,” adding that it had been used “as recently as 1818 in British Court.” To prepare, he requested 12 weeks “lead time” to have “1 Katana and 1 Wakitzashi sourced or forged for use.”
Tracked down by local reporters, Ostrom said that he’s a fan of the “Game of Thrones” series, in which the trial by combat method is employed repeatedly. Yet even in the notoriously harsh world of Westeros, the practice was eventually outlawed because of its brutality.
Ostrom told the Register he filed the motion out of frustration with the legal system, where he and his ex are litigating property tax and custody disputes. He also took issue with his ex’s attorney, Matthew Hudson.
“I think I’ve met Mr. Hudson’s absurdity with my own absurdity,” said Ostrom, who could not immediately be reached by The Washington Post.
In court, Hudson responded by correcting Ostrom’s spelling error (“Surely Petitioner meant ‘corporeal’ bodies”) and arguing that the “potentially life-ending ramifications” outweighed the issues at hand.
“Although the respondent and potential combatant do have souls to be rended,” Hudson wrote, “they respectfully request that the court not order this done.”
He also asked the judge to suspend Ostrom’s visitation rights and order him to get a psychological evaluation, according to the Gazette.
Ostrom said he has no mental health issues, the newspaper reported. He said that he doesn’t expect his request to be granted and has no experience of sword fighting. But given the chance, he would go through with it, anyway.
“If Mr. Hudson is willing to do it, I will meet him,” he told the Gazette. “I don’t think he has the guts to do it.”
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