Upon starting a venture, it makes sense to say yes to as many requests as possible. To take every opportunity to meet someone new or deepen a connection and build a network. There comes a time, however, when the opportunity cost of each invitation acceptance is too high. When your time would be far better spent honing your product or service and looking after your customers and team.
Too busy? Say no. Here's how.
As Peter Drucker put it, “People are effective because they say no.” When the tipping point comes will vary by individual and industry. Schmoozing might sound glamorous, but it’s an unsustainable strategy in the long term because it renders the cost of sale too high. At some point, your reputation has to precede you. Referrals have to happen. At this stage, you know you need to decline invitations but you’re not sure exactly how to. Here’s how.
Always give a reason
Share the reason you’re saying no and make it good. I’m focused on x project. I’m committed to finishing y. We’ve had a lot of traction with z and I’m making sure we deliver. Let them in on your world but be firm in your decline. Say it’s your personal policy so that you can be single-minded without distractions.
Perhaps you can assist in another way. Perhaps you can recommend someone else. Either way, a reason that can’t be argued with will make sure that it isn’t. No one wants their arm twisted into being somewhere when their mind is elsewhere.
Be super polite
Be gracious for the invitation and thank them for thinking of you. They didn’t have to ask. If you admire their work, say so. Be exceptionally polite in your response and leave on great terms. You never know what will happen in the future. Decline with gratitude.
The pleasure of your company being requested is an honour in itself, especially when it’s a person you admire or a publication you know of. Even when you don’t accept, share the appreciation and use the exchange as an excuse to reinforce their opinion of you.
Too busy? Say no. Here's how.
Put the ball in their court
Perhaps at the moment you’re not saying yes to podcast interviews but you will be in November when your new product is launched. Tell them that. If not now, when? Give a clear timeline and leave the follow ups to them. Some will come back and some won’t, but those that do are the ones that really want you there.
Your “no” might just be a “not yet”. Align requests with your plans and schedule to mean that when you do show up it’s the right time, your message is relevant, and you absolutely want to be there.
Wait to respond
If you respond straight away, you won’t seem like you’re too busy. Declining to focus on your work will be incongruous with the instant response you gave their email. Productivity experts recommend checking email in batches. A few times per day or a few times per week. Not every hour and definitely no notifications.
If you’re drowning in invitations it’s a good problem to have, but batch your responses and leave them until later. Better yet, have an autoresponder that directs those who require a quicker response than you’re prepared to give.
Create email signatures
Filtering invitations via an assistant is a false economy, but email signatures and shortcuts are your best friend. Create your most polite decline message and save it up. “I’m sorry I can’t, but…”. “Right now I’m focused on…”. You could call it a “diet”, and have email signatures for each one. Point to your three-month no conference diet, or your one month no meeting diet. Make it cover the whole year if that’s your preference.
In your email signature include a link to your now page. Keep that page updated with your area of focus. Include what you’re saying yes to and what you’re saying no to. Make it an autoresponder for a quick way of someone’s expectations being managed and to mean the no is less of a surprise when it comes their way.
Splitting your time and attention between multiple, often conflicting projects, is a sure-fire way to get approximately nothing done. Say no. Say no, say it again, and say it some more. Many opportunities can wait. Many events are annual. Many doors will be left open for you whenever you decide it’s time.
