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Do you have triggers that you can't change yet?

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Mine is about having very little money(on the level of I can't pay for food/bills) type of thing, so if I ever have money trouble I get myself in really bad state mentally if it goes on for too long.
In any case, the bad part is, once I am out of it(let's say I receive payment or whatnot, after having been waiting and figuring out miracles to pay for stuff) it's like this whole tension and flashbacks and triggers and things that had hold over me get released, and I am so weak with relief my brain starts racing and for like a day or two I'm completely incapable of actually working. Not sure what to do about that.
It's like while there was crisis and I had to figure out the next payment or meal I held on somehow, and once I get paid something(even if it's very little) or get the next work order, I just can't start on any new work for at least half a day...even when I think it would be a really useful idea....so yeah...that is one really important trigger. But yet one I haven't been able to change so far.
It just happened- this morning I finally got work after months of waiting and searching. It's not a deadline thing, but it's the sort of thing, the faster I do the job the faster I get paid. So I freed my day and was planning to do this job and others, but my mind is racing so much from relief and unbelieving that change is actually occurring and I can relax, that I can't calm down whatsoever and I just want to lay down so I don't feel dizzy.
 
One of my major triggers is being overly criticized by my parents and I am working on not letting it bother me. However, when it does get to me/is constant/ makes me feel out of control my PTSD symptoms definitely do flare up. I go into a deep depression, start having racing thoughts in relation to my trauma, and flashbacks. It is hard to pull myself out of it once I get there even with the triggers gone. It's almost like once the gates in my mind are open to the flashbacks/thoughts it is super hard to make them stop but, they do eventually. Right now I am emotionally numb/gates are closed but, last week I didn't think the thoughts and flashbacks would ever stop. Yes, I understand.
 
One of my major triggers is being overly criticized by my parents and I am working on not le...
That is exactly how I feel. What do you do to try to control it? Has anything ever worked at least a bit? I know it wears off after a bit, but my mind insists that losing that bit isn't a good idea.
 
Well I dont know if the following response is what you were looking for. What stops the flashbacks/depression/etc is eventually disassociation and that gives my mind a break for a few days however, I realize this is not a good coping strategy. I have also decided to get on an antidepressant this week? Also, when you are this distressed I would be very careful in how many times you journal as the journaling can make it worse. I really opened up to my T last session about how distressing my living situation is and she gave me some good tips. They seem like kind of "common sense" but, idk hearing it from her that day was extremely helpful. Basically just telling myself that their criticism of me really has nothing to do with me but, with their own insecurities. Both of my parents have MAJOR control issues and try to control everything down to what presents I buy my son for his birthday- the outfits, toys, etc... don't seem to meet my moms approval. My T just stated to basically not let their "crap" and baggage effect me. Realize that they both heavily criticize each other as well and it just trickles down to me. Remember hurt people hurt people. I think it is retraining your mind to not accept the beliefs of yourself that comes with the criticism and just realize sadly it is just them and they are not going to change. It's the negative thoughts about myself that I take in with the criticism that are damaging. Retraining your mind is what I am working on.
 
It just happened- this morning I finally got work after months of waiting and searching. It's not a deadline thing, but it's the sort of thing, the faster I do the job the faster I get paid. So I freed my day and was planning to do this job and others, but my mind is racing so much from relief and unbelieving that change is actually occurring and I can relax,


Seeking Africa, I'm wondering, is it also somthing like being overly alert, although objectively after the situation is somewhat resolved? You fear the next crisis just around the corner?
 
Reacting to power and subjection. Thats the hardest, and the most painful condition I have to still learn to deal with.
When dominance is coming my way, from certain people, with a certain attitude.

Even writing about this is painful and leaves me depressed.
 
Seeking Africa, I'm wondering, is it also somthing like being overly alert, although objectively after...
Yes, absolutely. It's like I only partly believe that the situation is actually solved until I see practical proof (money in my hand, not in a bank, not in a check, not in a project that I know will pay, even if I've been paid for the same/similar project before.).
 
Yep! I am not triggered by the "normal" ones like content. The triggers I can identify (as I have many I cannot identify) is being told I did something wrong as that gets twisted in my head as "I am bad". The words that was drilled so far in me that even after 8 yrs in therapy it is still a driving force.

But, it is only certian situations because I can take constructive critisims at work or about my art or other sorts of life stuff. So its not every situation in life. I think when it is simply critisim that isn't constructive or less constructive that really get me.

I don't know, it's hard to explain. My step mom can trigger me super easy. She says "trigger words". Like saying im a liar if she is being defensive, which is anytime you talk to her. My entire family calls me a liar about my past. She calls me evil. Evil are my abusers giving praises and sacrfises to Satan. She has many words she uses when she is defensive and when she is mad amd wanting to hurt me that set me off. Saying "no wonder your entire family hate you" and "you are all alone now. Good job!"

But the triggers I see a lot on here aren't mine.

I have yet to be able to change them or control how I react to them. Working on it though.
 
One of my biggest triggers is seeing knife blades. I don't think this will ever go away. I've had to hide all of my knives in a drawer or in a knife holder but only if the blades don't show much. Just taking one out and using it is triggering. I get flashes of memories that I've already had, rapid fire. I have a difficult time using box cutters to open boxes. Scissors just don't work as well, was going to say cut it. Bad pun. If I see box cutters opened to the blade...yikes...I usually gripe about why someone, only one other person in my house, didn't retract darned blade.
 
I have triggers & stressors I haven't gotten around to changing, for a various reasons... Although the most common reason is that they aren't really a high up on my problems list, because they're rarely in my life.

What harder than either, though, are; old habits, learned behaviors, & mind sets. I fall back into those, with very little provocation. And they're a lot more difficult to break. Because I'm not mixing up my past and present, there's no discordance. They're not over reactions, or my misreading the situation, but instead are simply how I handle that particular type of situation. They're not how I want to be, (if I'm irritated about them, and want to change them) but they're still -for whatever reason- my knee jerk reaction. If A? Then B. The logic simply flows. Breaking the logic? Is really hard, because -again- I'm not mixing up my past and present. No amount of grounding, or reality checks, or anything else can break into them. It's not something taking me back, it's something now. So? Instead, I have to recognize a pattern of thinking & behavior, and slowly start altering it.

FAR more closely related to cognitive distortions, than to triggers & stressors.

I'm differentiating, here, because some things? Are both. A trigger or stressor can drop kick me back in time, although those are fairly easy to break out of; AND it can be a learned pattern of behavior or thinking/feeling that I want to change.

My biggest tell? Is if something is really complicated for me. Food, for example, is really complicated for me. Certain aspects of relationships? Are really complicated for me. Et cetera.
 
People abandoning me.
People getting too close.
[/QUOTE...
Know that one too well.

I have triggers & stressors I haven't gotten around to changing, for a various reasons... Although the m...
Interesting. I think it's somewhat of a behavior pattern as well, didn't think of that. Still not sure how to alter it though, although may be it will happen over time by trial and error and trial again.
 
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