I committed a shameful act this last week. It is so embarrassing I almost want to post under a pseudonym in case anyone reads this in twenty years and judges me.
It all started when my wife and I spent the evening holed up in a Puerto Vallartan hotel room while the rain ruined our vacation. Don't go to tropical places in June.
The only choice was to flip through the television, skipping through the Spanish telemundos for the rare American channel. Finally, we stopped on a movie station. The program looked familiar but I couldn't put my name on it.
“You know what this is?” my wife said, a smug smile on her face. By the time I figured it out, it was too late.
I was hooked on Twilight. Shit.
There was nothing to be done. I flew through the movies, and then flew through the books, finally finishing them last night. It is obviously a great story. Why else would every woman under thirty own a copy and/or have a fantasy of a long, dark night with Edward Cullen?
But there are some glaring flaws.
“Wrong again,” he murmured in my ear. “You are utterly indecent—no one should look so tempting, it's not fair.”
“You… made… me… faint,” I accused him dizzily.
“What am I going to do with you?” he groaned in exasperation.
“So much for being good at everything,” he sighed.
“I'm fine,” I insisted. “Your family is going to think I'm insane anyway, what's the difference?”
“That's right,” I answered immediately.
“You do smell nice, I never noticed before,” she commented.
“I hope you haven't been showing off—it's rude,” she scolded.
“He's been too modest, actually,” I corrected.
“Well, play for her,” Esme encouraged.
Notice anything? I took these dialogue snippets from a few pages I randomly selected. But she makes the same mistake throughout all four novels. Can you figure out what the problem is?
Elmore Leonard said, Never use any word other than “said” as dialogue tags. Why? Try reading the above out loud. The “he exclaimed” and “he admonished” and “she cried” become like a child saying your name over and over. Distracting.
The word “said,” though, is easily ignored. You want the attention focused on the dialogue, not your clever use of verbs. In many cases, it's good to change up word choice. You don't want to use “quintessential” or “luminescence” too many times. “Said” is a major exception. Let us tune it out. Please.
Besides, does “exclaimed” or even “whispered” really change how you read the dialogue? Instead, show the emotion with an action. Like this:
“I hate you,” she exclaimed she said, hurling her French book at him. The corner struck him just under the eye. A bright red mark began to rise on his skin.
Books like Twilight can misuse dialogue tags like this because the plot will suck a reader in deep enough they will ignore the distraction.
But just because Stephanie Meyer can do it, doesn't mean you can.
PRACTICE
For fifteen minutes, write an argument between a couple over whether to watch Twilight or the Bourne Identity. Don't use any dialogue tags beside “said.”
Once you finish, post your practice in the comments. Have fun practicing!
I love this post and not just cause i’m your wife…:) i think its genius because it gives such a small and practical way to immediately improve your writing!
“Babe. You know what we should do tonight?” she said from the couch.
“What?” he said. He was washing the dishes.
“We should watch a movie?”
“That would be cool.” He finished and sat down on the couch. “What do you want to watch?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “Something fun. I can’t take anything super depressing right now.”
“Yeah, that sounds good. Why don’t you go pick out two or three and we’ll decide.”
“Okay.” She skipped into the bedroom.
“Babe. What’s taking you so long,” he said.
“Sorry. Almost done.”
She sat down with three DVDs.
“Ugh. BABE,” he said.
“What?”
“You have to choose some variety. You can’t pick all three Twilight movies.”
“But I love Twilight.” She wiggled on the couch. She batted her eyes at him.
“Come on. You know I can’t watch that movie. At least pick out a neutral one. Like the Bourne series.”
“The Bourne series,” she said. “The Bourne series is neutral?”
“Yeah,” he said. “There’s a love story in it.”
“A love story?” Her eyebrows disappeared under her bangs.
“Yeah. In the first one.”
“Right. In between Matt Damon breaking people’s limbs and skulls.”
“Exactly. Matt Damon’s in it. He’s hot, right?”
“What?” she said. “I can’t believe you would even say that. You’re such a… guy.”
“It’s better than Twilight, babe. Anything is better than that.”
“You’ve never even seen it. You might like it if you tried it.”
“Trust me. I know enough about it to know I’m going to hate it.”
“Just like you thought you were going to hate Tangled?”
“That’s different,” he said. “That was a cartoon. And it was funny. This is two people staring at each other for an hour and a half.”
“I don’t want to watch any of the Bournes. We’ve seen them like twenty times.”
“Because they’re so good you can watch them ove and over again.”
“But I’m tired of them,” she said. “Can’t you just watch Twilight one time. We always watch what you want.”
“Because I like good movies. Unlike some people.”
“Ugh. You’re annoying?”
“I’m annoying? You want to make me watch Twilight and I’m annoying?”
Bahahahaha you Buntings crack me up.
That’s such a huge way to improve writing–and an easy way to reduce a heavy word count!
I’ve never seen or read Twilight… just don’t have the desire for it. I have one friend who is a writer who things the S.M. is the most brilliant author ever… another writer friend who things she’s the equivalent of a first grader learning to pen a first composition. Actually, that friend would say that’s an insult to the first grader. 🙂
Ha! That’s hilarious Kristen. I’d probably agree with both. She does some things very well and others not so well.
Like you I had no desire until it was too late. Don’t get caught by it. That’s all I can say.
I’ll do my best!
We paged through movies on Netflix, reading descriptions but not finding much that interested us both.
“Whoa, Bourne Identity!,” he said.
I closed my eyes and shook my head. “No!”
When I looked over at him, he rolled his eyes in response. “Come on, baby, it’s awesome. Don’t you like Matt Damon anyway?”
“Well, yeah, but I’ve already seen that movie. I want to watch something new,” I said.
He sighed, and paged through the next menu of suggested titles. When I saw it, I screeched.
“Oh my god, Twilight! Oh my god, I have been really wanted to see this, please, can we watch it?” I said.
“Absolutely no way in hell. No way,” he said.
“Why not?” I said, “Anyway, Kristen Stewart is a total babe, so you’d get to enjoy it too.”
“Really?” he said.
“Umm, yeah. That was your reason for mentioning Matt Damon, right? Just using your argument against you.”
“Oh, that’s low,” he said.
“But it wasn’t low when you said it? Come on now,” I said.
He rolled his eyes at me for a second time, and I could feel myself growing hot.
“You know what? If you’re gonna be like that, how about we just don’t watch a movie at all?” I said, jumping up from my place on the couch.
Nice, Kate. Perfect speaker tags (of course) and lots of fun conflict in the dialogue. Well done!
We paged through movies on Netflix, reading descriptions but not finding much that interested us both.
“Whoa, Bourne Identity!,” he said.
I closed my eyes and shook my head. “No!”
When I looked over at him, he rolled his eyes in response. “Come on, baby, it’s awesome. Don’t you like Matt Damon anyway?”
“Well, yeah, but I’ve already seen that movie. I want to watch something new,” I said.
He sighed, and paged through the next menu of suggested titles. When I saw it, I screeched.
“Oh my god, Twilight! Oh my god, I have been really wanted to see this, please, can we watch it?” I said.
“Absolutely no way in hell. No way,” he said.
“Why not?” I said, “Anyway, Kristen Stewart is a total babe, so you’d get to enjoy it too.”
“Really?” he said.
“Umm, yeah. That was your reason for mentioning Matt Damon, right? Just using your argument against you.”
“Oh, that’s low,” he said.
“But it wasn’t low when you said it? Come on now,” I said.
He rolled his eyes at me for a second time, and I could feel myself growing hot.
“You know what? If you’re gonna be like that, how about we just don’t watch a movie at all?” I said, jumping up from my place on the couch.
Nice, Kate. Perfect speaker tags (of course) and lots of fun conflict in the dialogue. Well done!
As a writer I find S.M.’s “Twilight” books offensive to those of us who really can write. While she may tell a good story (though I’m not interested) she doesn’t say it well. I have also noticed a good deal of so-called excellant writers tend to overuse the word that and THAT drives me crazy! I was always told to read the sentence without it and if it still makes sense-take That word That out!
You might be right, Mr. Jbeethoven. But it won’t do to criticize a writer for their lack of skill with a comment full of typos and grammatical errors. Excellent is spelled with three e’s, and if the word “and” starts a new sentence, you need to put a comma before it.
Yes, Stephenie makes mistakes, but don’t we all.
As a writer I find S.M.’s “Twilight” books offensive to those of us who really can write. While she may tell a good story (though I’m not interested) she doesn’t say it well. I have also noticed a good deal of so-called excellant writers tend to overuse the word that and THAT drives me crazy! I was always told to read the sentence without it and if it still makes sense-take That word That out!
You might be right, Mr. Jbeethoven. But it won’t do to criticize a writer for their lack of skill with a comment full of typos and grammatical errors. Excellent is spelled with three e’s, and if the word “and” starts a new sentence, you need to put a comma before it.
Yes, Stephenie makes mistakes, but don’t we all.
My wife told me not to read this book because of the vampire issues, that was before she read it herself. Afterwards she told me not to read it for the writing issues, and the non-traditional vampires.
I try to use “said” in all my dialogue. Wonderful post!
Ha. That’s funny.
Thanks Brian.
My wife told me not to read this book because of the vampire issues, that was before she read it herself. Afterwards she told me not to read it for the writing issues, and the non-traditional vampires.
I try to use “said” in all my dialogue. Wonderful post!
Ha. That’s funny.
Thanks Brian.
“I said” over and over again can get very tiresome, though. Which is why a lot of authors use other descriptive words for it. Brilliant dialogue can be drowned out by more than just colorful verbs.
Not really. While there are some authors who use other words fairly well, they usually do so along with something much more interesting, and many authors very rarely use a different word.
I also feel like in a dialogue with only 2 people, it’s not wrong to leave out the tags after a few times. Just have a “A”, “B”, “A”, “B” dialogue. If the reader doesn’t get confused as to who says what, you also know that you’ve written the characters memorably and well.
“I said” over and over again can get very tiresome, though. Which is why a lot of authors use other descriptive words for it. Brilliant dialogue can be drowned out by more than just colorful verbs.
“Hey,” I said.
“What’s up?” He said.
“Oh, nothing much,” I said. “Ryan’s treating me like a loaf of bread again, though.”
“What’s so bad about a loaf of bread?” He said.
“I don’t know, it just seems stupid I guess,” I said.
“Oh wow, Cassandra,” he said.
I’m sorry but the word said just gets annoying after awhile.
Right, but if you use said 50% of the time, nothing 45% of the time, and other words 5% of the time, it works out. If the text is so short and/or the reader definitely knows who is talking, you don’t need any dialogue word
True, I had realized this later 🙂
You’re over using it. The point is to know when not to and when do with both kinds and to use what works for the characters and the story. When it’s obvious who’s speaking don’t use any keep it simple; focus on the characters, story and plot that is what matters not the format.
Well,why can’t we just use said only one time for each character in conversation.Like-
“Using the same word-said many times is boring!”John said,”What do you think?”
“But using other words is distracting,”Jay said,”I prefer peanut butter sandwiches the most,”
“Talk some sense,will you?”
“Like it is your habit.”
“Fine.Bye.”
If there’s only two characters in the scene, you might not need speaker tags at all. Or you can add actions instead, like: Jasper leaned over the railings, painting. “Can we take a break now?”
You know that he was speaking because the action is related to the dialogue.
It’s really bad, actually. As I was reading the lines from Twilight, I noticed how boring it suddenly sounded and I was no longer focusing on the conversation, but the annoying fact that she’s using too many dialogue tags unnecessarily. Swap Twilight for another book (maybe Divergent?) and see how dialogue tags can change so much in the writing. And then try doing it yourself. You say it’s repetitive, but the only purpose of them is to not confuse readers of who is talking. Readers skim through ‘said’, and so the dialogue becomes the main focus. Sometimes, it’s better not to use them at all if there’s only two people in the scene, or you can do this:
“Where have you been?”
Rachel throws her arms behind her head. “Nowhere, just for a walk.”
You see what I did? You know that Rachel is speaking just because of the action she just did. I didn’t even need to use the word ‘said’.
“I said.” If the dialogue is sandwiched? Layered with action, the “I said” shouldn’t be needed. I’ve learned to do this – mostly – and find it does tighten up the prose, the action. ‘But sometimes, I’ve noticed, I slip up.’ She glances over her shoulder, in case somebody’s checking. ‘I mean, maybe it could be necessary?’
Definitely! for instance, ‘Come here and take a look at this,’ he whispers. ‘Careful now. we don’t want them to catch on.’ One could write IN CAPITALS to show that the character is angry, but to whisper in tiny font is a practice which I don’t think will be successful. To show rage by flashing eyes, teeth gritted, hands clenched or throwing things, throwing punches, okay, that would work. Still, heads together, speaking in soft tone, instead of using the word – whispering – possibly. What do you think?
This was so helpful Joe. As a newby in fiction writing, I will use said gladly. Sometimes I find authors don’t use an author tag many times in their book. I get so confused I have to reread from the start to figure out who is speaking. I become frustrated after a while and attribute it to a certain lack of skill in their ability to write dialogue and differentiated characters.
I understand that this is so dead by now, it being four years old and all. Perhaps someone will still stumble across this anyway and appreciate my advice.
I think that, for the most part, the use of dialogue tags will be subjective. Some people enjoy the simplicity of said, while others indulge in “fancier” tags. Personally, I use both. I think that more often than not said will suffice, but what if the character is asking as opposed to saying?
To say is declarative while to ask is interrogative. I think that for those who agree with only using said could at least consider using the tag “asked” when dealing with interrogative sentences. While on the other hand, those who enjoy the colour of “fancier” tags could consider toning it down a notch. I do admit that this can be distracting, what with all the howling, hooting, and hissing. It’s like discovering a new synonym for ‘said’ at every corner with some authors.
All that being *said*, I like to find the middle ground in all of this (though I do lean a bit more to only using the word “said”). If the context really fits, as in there is no other word for it but that one you’re so desperately wanting to use, then maybe that is the best word for it. If you really want that word to count, though, don’t vomit different tags so that it just seems like you searched for another new way to tag your dialogue.
At the end of the day, we’re all just writers who are using our own *individual* voices to tell a story. If said works for you, use it. Some people may find it dry. If you prefer to howl, hoot, and hiss, then by all means, do so. However, some people may get distracted, maybe even annoyed at your different tags.
It’s a shame we really can’t win them all.
writing a book, & this has helped SO much <3
“Alright,” she said, and slammed down the package on the coffee-table. “Here’s our movie for tonight.”
He took the box from its package and stared at it. “You got us Twilight?”
“The whole saga.”
“That’s, like, four movies!”
“Five, actually,” she said.
“On hard copies?”
“Why not?”
“Why not Netflix?”
“Because that’s where all your rubbish is,” she said. Her tone was flat but provoking.
“Excuse me? Bourne Identity is not rubbish.”
“Ha!”
He glared. “Admit it. You’re prejudiced against spy movies.”
“Okay – I don’t like spy movies.” She stuck out her tongue and said, “And you’re biased against romance.”
“Is Twilight even romance? All I know is they’re vampires.”
“The cover’s got this cute pale guy embracing that girl. It’s romance.”
“Some romance.”
She snorted. “Yeah, and Bourne Identity is so romantic.”
“For the last time,” he said, “Bourne Identity isn’t supposed to be romance. It’s about a spy who bashes bad guys’ skulls in!”
“Okay, whatever. And vampires suck blood. You can get on with that, can you?” He was about to cut her off when she said, “So we’re watching Twilight tonight. My pick.”
After saying that we should use action to describe the emotion, a piece of dialogue was shown with the word “exclaimed” crossed out. I first read the dialogue with “exclaimed”, and I “saw” someone screaming “I hate you”. I then read the dialogue with “said” and I saw someone saying “I hate you” with deep hatred. In my opinion, I believe that it really just depends on how the author/writer wants the dialogue to be perceived.
I didn’t know what dialog tags were before today, but I have used them extensively. I thought they would be helpful to set the tone. I love the way actions substitute the need for any further designation of the speaker. What a fun blog. I am really enjoying this. Thank you for sharing.
It’s thursday and It’s movie date day. We decided to rent some dvd on our way home. Robert is looking on the action section while I’m on the romance.
“What? Twilight! Oh my this will be our movie tonight!” I quickly snatch the cd and run over to where Robert is. “Honey look, it’s twilight lets watch this!” I said happily. My smile went away quickly because I saw him holding to another cd.
“Can we watch Bourne Legacy instead?” he said and I glared at him. I guessed this will be war because I really want to watch Twilight tonight. “No, we will be watching twilight tonight!”
“But twilight is boring and this is more interesting with all the action and stuff,” he said
“Twilight is not boring plus it’s action pact too with all the vampires! Edward Cullen is here too aww” hugging the cd and being cute. I know he’s weak to my cutesy.
He sighed, “but I really want to watch Bourne Legacy today” while he slowly returns the cd in its place and my smile is getting wider. Then he stopped. “Hey,” He raised his eyebrows and looked at me. “Isn’t it my turn today to pick the movie,”
“What? Is it?” I scanned to my memory, hoping it isn’t but it is. I pouted, I can never win to that, I thought. “Okay, fine. You win” I said sadly, I liked Matt Damon too anyways.
“Yes!” he takes the cd and hurriedly went over the counter but just as he was going to he snatched mine as well. “What are you doing?” I said.
“We’ll just have to watch them both then, You know I love it when you smile more,” he winks. I went over to him and hugged him. “Your the best! So which one are we gonna watch first?” and the real battle begins.
okay I went over the deadline my bad
sigh. I Just Printed out a Whole List of tags, from a Pin recommended for me personally by my computer. Literally; 101 descriptive alternatives to the word: Said. (mumble, gripe, snigger, moan, whine, sputter…..)
“Obviously we’re watching the Bourne Identity,” I said, crossing my arms and narrowing my eyes at my best friend Staci. She could be a bit girly, which I was not in the slightest. “But Twilight!” she said, staring at the Redbox options. “It has freaking Edward Cullen. Who doesn’t love Edward Cullen?” “Um, me!” I said, rolling my eyes.
Why does every freaking girl have to be so stereotypical towards Edward Cullen? I wondered.
“Matt Damon can be cute in this movie, if you look at him in a certain way.”
“Oh yeah?” she said, smirking. “What way?”
“Well,” I said. “Think of him as the boyfriend who can actually protect you. I mean, he’s a freaking assassin for crying out loud! Edward Cullen is a vampire, which doesn’t exist, which therefore means he can’t protect you like a real man should. Point proven.” Staci pulled out her bottom lip. “But come on!” she said, throwing her hands up in the air. “It’s girl’s night, Rose! We have to do something girly for a change.” “Sorry,” I said, shrugging. “Guess we have to call it something else.” Staci huffed. Then she said, “Please?” But I was already tapping away on the Redbox screen. I swiped my card and said, “Done! Sorry Staci, maybe another time when I’m dead.” Her mouth dropped open as I smirked at her and strolled away with the Bourne Identity disc box. “B-but-but!” she said, and her face dropped.
“Fiiinnne. But next time, it’s Twilight.”
Here’s my example it’s far from perfect but I think it’s clear who’s talking.
From Soul Tear – Chapter Four: Parcival:
Opening her eyes some time later, she recoiled away from an unfamiliar touch. Just who was this?
She eyed him for a moment. “Don’t touch me.”
“Do you have any idea what that thing was?” He stood then pointed to a mass of green vines, mashed to a pulp.
She moaned and as she rubbed her temples. “No, I don’t.” The lack of sleep didn’t help.
He walked over to the fireplace and leaned against the mantel.
“The blasted vine was crawling towards the door when I came in here. You might want to consider sleeping elsewhere.”
There was no elsewhere, it traveled with, but he didn’t need to know about
that. She re-positioned her body, sitting upright. “It’s gone now,
there’s no need.”
As the fog of pain lifted, she realized he never answered her first question. An assassin?
Reaching down as if to scratch an itch on her leg, without warning, she pulled out a small dark dagger from her boot.
Within a hairs-split moment, she moved facing him. The dagger point drew a fine line of blood below his Adam’s apple.
“Now, give me a reason why I shouldn’t kill you for entering my room without permission?”
His hand twitched. Impressive, most were frightened of her speed.
“Don’t.” Speaking in a low clear voice while pushing the dagger in deeper. “Are you working for the king’s guards?”
“If I hadn’t broken in you’d have bled to death.” He snorted.
“Don’t you have something to fix somewhere?” She squinted and lowered the dagger from his neck.
“You should go clean your nails with that pig sticker.'” He pinched the blades and moved it away.
“Just go.” She hissed through her teeth. How dare he trump me, argg!
He turned towards her at the doorway, as if he wanted to say something but stopped.
I’m still working out the kinks in Wattpad, come look for me if you want to do a critique swap. 🙂
Few months ago I was reading a novel where the writer didn’t use any speaker tags except “said”. It was a painful journey for me till the end. I figured, speaker tags are handful during reading but while writing they worn me down & slow down my writing process because I have to stop & think for a new term on every new sentenc
“Whoah, stop!” Jessica said, waving her hands as Tyler scrolled across his Netflix queue.
“What do you want me to stop for?” Tyler was fearful that his girlfriend would snatch the remote right out of his hands.
“Go back, they have Twilight!”
“Stop bouncing, and no, we are not watching that,” he said. “C’mon, The Borne Identity is here somewhere. I saw it yesterday.”
“Aww, why can’t I pick the movie for once?” Jessica crossed her arms and gave Tyler her best, most convincing pouty-face.
He shook his head and put the remote down. “Don’t act that way,” he said, “You pick the movie whenever we’re at your house. That’s the deal. Whoever owns the TV picks the movie.”
“Yeah, but I don’t have Netflix or an HD TV,” Jessica said. “I wanna watch Twilight in HD!”
“You’ve seen it a billion times!”
“It’s worth watching a billion times!”
“No, let me find The Borne Identity.”
“Let’s make a deal,” Jessica said, getting up from the couch. She walked across the room and rummaged through her bookshelf until she found the book, Twilight. She walked back to Tyler and dropped the book in his lap. “We’ll watch your movie if you read the book. I promise you’ll love it.”
Tyler looked down at the book, then picked it up gingerly and set it aside. “Never mind, we’ll watch the movie,” he said.
Honestly, I think you can choose anything as long as you know how to handle it. I think the main problem is that most writers feel the need to use a dialogue tag after every single direct speech. That is definitely distracting. I personally prefer a slow-pace dialogue where some tags are replaced by descriptive parts, thoughts, pieces of a story. But if you need quicker pace – you don’t need to use dialogue tags at all. Use “said” once. Include one short descriptive sentence to control the pace a bit. Include one thought. That’s all you need to do. Well, opinions may vary, but that’s what my favorite authors do and that’s what I learned to do to maintain the flow.
We finally get home after a cold walk through the streets, as we decided to walk home from our neighbourhood restaurant, after having dinner.
C. was intrigued by the discussion we had on our way home and takes no second thought ..
• Joker evil face hiding before she turns to me
– We’re gonna watch Twilight tonight, hon’ .. She said
• Totaly surprised
– And that’s because.. ?.. I said
• High chin, blinking childish
– I say so!.. She said
• Trying to search in the archives of my memories a moment when I did such thing to her, for this seems like a payback for the same kind of action that I took against her, in a vague and skeptik wonder I go..
– Your “I say so”, can indeed change the colours you choose for your paintings yet not decisions we discussed about for 30 minutes, which concluded with us watching Bourne Identity, so..!?
– Sure thing, cup cake yet I just had a genius flashback.. She said.
– Oh, now you made me curious, not! Can we skip your Schizofrenic genius and just watch this awesome action movie, PLEASE? .. I said
• Looking serious for the first time that night
– At least hear me out, you untaimable sexual addict you! ..She said
• Slightly irritated
– Oh, right, so your way of fighting back my innocent jokes is salting some real wounds that your lover has, huh? I said
• Ironically
– It’s nothing more than justice between two grownups and I tell you, we’re gonna watch Twilight tonight! She said.
• Frowning
– I see where you’re going with this. I said.
• Rasing eyebrows
– Really? Where exactly do you think I’m going with it? She said
• Rolling eyes
– This smells from a mile away like blackmail. I said as I made myself comfortable in my armchair in front of the TV.
– Well, you are a fan and unquestionable practitioner of philosophy so.. it is a matter of perspective here. She said, while bringing me a glass of red wine.
– Please do me a favour and..
• All of a sudden her soft and warm hands reach from behind, in my T-shirt
– What sort of favour should your heart beat around, hon’? Just complete the sentence and I’ll surely give it a serious thought. She said, with an air of a warmed up completely gorgeous woman, with a voice and tonality to make viagra feel tiny shit in a pill.
– Aaaa, not so sure I am still into that favour I was thinking of. Why don’t you just go on with your art there and I will just try hearing you out. I said, with my eyes closed, high on the foreplay’s electricity which was filling the air with umidity and drying out my lips already.
– Ok, I will give it a go for you. Remember that day in Salzburg when we were both so happy for meeting each other, for living this magical whatever you wanna call it? You know, that same moment when you hang a lock with our names on to the fence? She said, with a little intensified breathing that was synced with mine.
– Yes, it’s actually the day when we got engaged, of course I will always remember it with love and respect. I said, while envisioning the so blessed moments she was speaking about, with a small smile on my face yet eyes still closed.
– Indeed, so do I, yet right there, is the key to this night’s unfolding. She said, very close to my ear, with a hot hand pulling my head very easily towards her lips and the other sliding down on my abs.
– You shure do possess and know how to make use of all keys to my heart, my mind and my pants, don’t you? I said, embracing whatever was about to come.
• Easily proceeding with her song along my body
– It seems so and I wanna make sure noone else has, nor can use a key against my lover. She said. With an even more increased breathing and an adorable fade in to a song made of pure love manifesting through “uhmmm”.
• Not wanting to change a thing in the way the events unfold, with a balanced intent of contributing .
– There is nothing to worry about in there, the keys for all that I am, flow in the blood your heart beats in those hands, those lips, those brests you welcome me to get a taste of as we speak. I said, as I hardly can engage in thinking, sensing one of her hands slowly guiding one of mine to her brest.
– I think the beginning of our discussion is no longer that relevant right now, is it? She said, yet I could barely make sense of it in a way to be able to question it..
..as she found her perfect rhytm of moves with a gorgeously shaped ass, covered in lean skin and the sexyest undewear stretching around 2 hot as fuck ass cheeks, snakin’ on my hard dick, the upper body showing me some admirable arched back leaning on my chest with her neck screaming for a kiss to turn into a lick, one hand on her young brests and one going down, down where is warm and wet, guided by her own hand.
She finds her way to unbotton my pants, without stopping the “dance”, without interrupting the mesmerizing view, feeling and flow of things.
Slowly manages to let my lower body completely uncovered when she is playing getting me rid of the T-shirt with her wet pussy touching in a forward-backwards movement the tip of my so hard and craving for her, dick.
– How would you like some Bourne Identity now? She said to my ear, with a tone and breath that were singing what was happening down there where she kept on playing with the electricity between us, sliding just a the tip inside where was the only place I was dreaming of in that very moment.
– I don’t know what you’re talking about, I am so much into Twilight that we’re gonna see it just as many times as you will let me penetrate that dreamzone down there, which can be lots and lots of times, woman. I said and took her „Twilight” all the way in and gave no more fucks about Bourne Identity.