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The Asshole Survival Guide: How to Deal with People Who Treat You Like Dirt Hardcover – September 12, 2017

by Robert I. Sutton (Author)

4.3 1,062 ratings

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If you're feeling stressed out, overtaxed, under-appreciated, bullied, or abused because you work with a jerk, learn how to avoid, outwit, and disarm assholes—today.

Equally useful and entertaining, The Asshole Survival Guide delivers a cogent and methodical game plan when you find yourself working with a jerk—whether in the office, on the field, in the classroom, or just in life.

Sutton starts with diagnosis—what kind of asshole problem, exactly, are you dealing with? From there, he provides field-tested, evidence-based, and sometimes surprising strategies for dealing with the rude, impolite, irritating, unpleasant, or just plain incompetent—avoiding them, outwitting them, disarming them, sending them packing, and developing protective psychological armor. Sutton even teaches readers how to look inward to stifle their own inner jackass.    

Ultimately, this survival guide is about developing an outlook and personal plan that will help you preserve the sanity in your life, and will prevent all those perfectly good days from being ruined by some jerk.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"This survival guide is here to help keep you from going insane. It’s full of science-driven tips and strategies on how to deal with nasty bosses, manipulative colleagues, or other general jerks in your life." — W Magazine

"People are jerks. And there’s plenty of evidence to prove it in the very blunt self-help book called “The A—hole Survival Guide,” a scholarly source that teaches fed-up readers how to deal with co-workers, strangers and just about anyone who sucks." —Moneyish

"Sutton offers a variety of techniques that people suffering the presence of difficult individuals at their work, in their sports teams or just in everyday life can employ to deal with them or fight back. . . This is a small book but it could play a big part in making us treat others better." —Forbes

"If everyone had paid attention to the Stanford business professor's best-selling 2007 management manifesto, "The No Asshole Rule," there would be no need for a follow-up. Yet here we are." —Esquire

The crowded genre of workplace bullying books features clever titles...the best of the authors in the category is Stanford Professor Robert Sutton, who published The No Asshole Rule a decade ago and returns now with a more fully developed plan of action." —The National Book Review

"Sutton’s breezy writing style, combined with the wide array of anecdotes and stories from people who’ve written him about their difficulties, makes for an entertaining read...consider that the physical book itself might be a solution to an a-hole at work. Much like the effect Sutton’s first book reportedly has had, simply leaving The Asshole Survival Guide prominently on your desk may send all the signal you need." —SmartUp

“In this most-welcome sequel to Sutton’s bestselling The No Asshole Rule, the author turns from an organization-wide perspective to an individual one, outlining strategies for dealing with difficult people at work.” —Publishers Weekly

“Bob Sutton is very wise and very funny, AND he can tell you exactly how to handle the unfortunate reality that into every life a few assholes must fall. THE ASSHOLE SURVIVAL GUIDE is destined to become your go-to resource whenever you find yourself dealing with people who would treat you poorly.” —Susan Cain, New York Times bestselling author of QUIET

“At last someone has provided clear steps for rejecting, deflecting, and deflating the jerks who blight our lives. Better still, that someone is the great Bob Sutton, which ensures that the information is useful, evidence-based, and fun to read.” —Robert Cialdini, author of New York Times bestsellers INFLUENCE and PRE-SUASION

“No matter what industry or profession you work in, you will always encounter people who are unpleasant, off-putting, or downright self-centered. Thank goodness Bob Sutton has provided us with such a well-crafted guide for surviving these jerks. It is mandatory reading for anyone who strives to endure, escape, fend-off, and bring them down.” —Chip Conley, founder and past CEO of Joie de Vivre hotels, advisor and former Head of Global Hospitality and Strategy at Airbnb, author of four books including the New York Times best seller Emotional Equations.

“With humor, understanding and comprehensive research – and an ah-ha moment on every page – this is a must-have for leaders and climbing stars alike, from the expert on the subject. Bravo!” —Marshall Goldsmith, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller TRIGGERS

“This is the guide you need for handling the worst people in your life—and making sure they don’t rub off on you. If you’ve ever had a horrible boss, client, or colleague, this book is bursting with advice that’s often ingenious and always actionable. And if your world has been free of jerks, consider this an insurance policy.” —Adam Grant, New York Times bestselling author of GIVE AND TAKE and ORIGINALS, and coauthor of OPTION B

“Assholes are like the weather—everybody complains about them but nobody ever does anything about them. Until, that is, Robert Sutton’s Asshole Survival Guide. Sutton offers a wealth of helpful, and dare I say wise suggestions about how to identify and deal with the assholes in your organization, or at least minimize the damage they do to the well-being and productivity of others. (I’d also suggest bringing it along to family reunions and PTA meetings.)” —Geoff Nunberg, University of California at Berkeley, author of Ascent of the A-Word: Assholism, the First Sixty Years.

"One of the biggest impediments to achieving a great workplace is assholes. Their behavior creates a hostile work environment that leads to decreased engagement, productivity and employee loyalty. Bob Sutton has written a fantastic book that explains the severity of the problem and provides useful strategies for dealing with it.” —Paul Purcell, Chairman and former long-time CEO of Baird, ranked fourth on Fortune’s Top 100 Companies to Work For and renowned for its long-time “no assholes” policy.

"Reading the Asshole Survival Guide made me wistful. If only Bob Sutton's book had been available to help me deal with the full complement of 1st-class assholes I've encountered in my 50-year professional life. No names shall be mentioned." —Tom Peters, co-author of the bestseller IN SEARCH OF EXCELLENCE

"First, The No Asshole Rule alerted us to the problem. Now, The Asshole Survival Guide offers the solution. This book is a contemporary classic—a shrewd and spirited guide to reducing our exposure and protecting ourselves from the jerks, bullies, tyrants, and trolls who seek to dispirit and demean. Now more than ever, with civility and decency under attack, we desperately need this antidote to the a-holes in our midst.” —Daniel H. Pink, bestselling author of To Sell is Human and Drive

"As much as we try to avoid assholes, inevitably they appear in our lives. Bob Sutton gives us a menu of clear, thoughtful, and practical solutions for surviving and thriving in those painful situations. With cutting-edge research and real-life examples that are thought-provoking and often hilarious, The Asshole Survival Guide is an indispensable resource.” —Gretchen Rubin, bestselling author of THE HAPPINESS PROJECT and BETTER THAN BEFORE

"It's hard to know how to react to a jerk, so The Asshole Survival Guide is a Godsend. Obnoxious behavior is a double whammy. First, you feel mad at the other person. Next, you feel mad at yourself for your response / lack of response. It's being mad at yourself that is both hard to be aware of, and is most debilitating. With this brilliant and funny book, Bob Sutton saves you from fear, loathing, and self-loathing!" —Kim Scott, bestselling author of the New York Times bestseller, Radical Candor, cofounder of Candor, Inc, former executive at Google and Apple

About the Author

ROBERT SUTTON is a Stanford University professor and author of six management books, including the New York Times bestsellers The No Asshole Rule and Good Boss, Bad Boss. He is an IDEO Fellow and cofounder of the Stanford Technology Ventures Program and the Stanford Design Institute (known as the d.school). He lives in Menlo Park, California.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Mariner Books (September 12, 2017)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 224 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1328695913
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1328695918
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1 pounds
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.5 x 0.86 x 8.25 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #930,215 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #284 in Business Image & Etiquette
- #1,880 in Workplace Culture (Books)

Customer Reviews:
4.3 1,062 ratings

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Robert I. Sutton

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Robert Sutton is a Stanford Professor, organizational researcher, and best-selling author. His seven management books include bestsellers The No A**hole Rule, Good Boss, Bad Boss, and (with Huggy Rao) Scaling Up Excellence. His latest book is The A**hole Survival Guide:How to Deal With People Who Treat You Like Dirt.

Sutton was named as one of 10 B-School All-Stars by BusinessWeek, described as professors who are influencing contemporary business thinking far beyond academia. Sutton is an IDEO Fellow and co-founder of the Stanford Technology Ventures Program, Center for Work and and Stanford Design Institute (the d.school). His latest adventure at Stanford is the Designing Organizational Change project, which you can learn about at http://stvp.stanford.edu/doc. He has written over 150 academic and popular articles and chapters, and over 1000 blog posts. He often leads workshops and gives speeches about his books and is academic director of several Stanford executive programs including Customer-focused Innovation. Sutton tweets @work_matters. Visit www.bobsutton.net to learn more.

Customer reviews

1,062 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book provides practical advice for dealing with jerks and bad behaviors at work. They find it easy to read and straightforward, with humor and sharp insights. The book is described as humorous, entertaining, and a great follow-up to the first book. Readers appreciate the honesty, authenticity, and accuracy of the content.

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Information quality Readability Ease of use Humor Follow-up Authenticity Jerkiness

46 customers mention "Information quality"42 positive4 negative

Customers find the book provides practical advice for dealing with stress at home and work. It offers coping strategies and allows them to evaluate different approaches. The information is based on common sense and is concise, useful, and must-have for professionals.

"...enjoyed the chapters on “A Avoidance Techniques” and “Mind Tricks That Protect Your Soul.” A’s could be prevalent throughout an organization...." Read more

"...’s insights are both humorous and actionable, making it easier to maintain your sanity while confronting toxic behavior...." Read more

"This book was a good read, although not spectacular. The core messages were excellent, but I had to do a lot of wading through unnecessarily..." Read more

"...He has very practical advice for dealing with the *** in your life at home, work, or just even strangers...." Read more

37 customers mention "Readability"37 positive0 negative

Customers find the book easy to read and engaging. They appreciate the stories and advice on protecting health in an easy-to-understand format. Readers consider it a good book for new hires entering the workforce.

"I’m going to avoid spelling out the A word as I write this. The book is a great read...." Read more

"Good Product" Read more

"This book was a good read, although not spectacular...." Read more

"Great book for those who are experiencing all levels of anxiety in and outside the work place. Wish it had been written 40 years ago...." Read more

8 customers mention "Ease of use"6 positive2 negative

Customers find the book straightforward and easy to read. They say it's practical and can help them deal with issues.

"Read it in a few hours--read first in series years ago, great time saver as a manager...." Read more

"...In this new book Sutton gives us easy solutions to not only dealing with noxious people but thriving despite them!..." Read more

"...This book is boring, does not offer any real solutions and totally missed the psychology of my most Aho...are AH..Narcissist bosses or brothers or..." Read more

"Very honest, practical and straightforward..." Read more

7 customers mention "Humor"7 positive0 negative

Customers find the book humorous and entertaining. They say it's not a fluffy book of sarcasm, but an informative read.

"...Robert’s insights are both humorous and actionable, making it easier to maintain your sanity while confronting toxic behavior...." Read more

"...I am only about 1/2 way through this book and it is so funny!..." Read more

"...A great read because Sutton is funny and sharp witted--AND gives practical solutions that work...." Read more

"It's a great read, quite accurate, to the point and funny in places too...." Read more

5 customers mention "Follow-up"5 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the follow-up book. They say it's a good addition to the first book.

"A terrific follow up to Sutton's first book on jerks at work, this sequel provides a practical, useful and much needed guide to help navigate around..." Read more

"Bought 3 copies for friends and myself. Great sequel to his first book." Read more

"Great follow-up to previous book, with grounded, practical advice." Read more

"Great followup to first book..." Read more

3 customers mention "Authenticity"3 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's authenticity. They find it honest, practical, and straightforward. The book is accurate and funny in parts.

"It's a great read, quite accurate, to the point and funny in places too...." Read more

"Fun reading and very true." Read more

"Very honest, practical and straightforward..." Read more

3 customers mention "Jerkiness"3 positive0 negative

Customers find the book helpful for dealing with office jerks and bad behaviors. It provides tips on how to avoid being a jerk at work.

"...This one has fantastic tips to deal with jerks you are stuck with." Read more

"...It tells you about office jerks on all levels and the tactics to deal with them, including jerks you cannot win against AKA your boss...." Read more

"...help navigate around others' bad behaviors at work -- and avoid being a jerk ourselves!..." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

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Craig Kensek
Add “The A Survival Guide” to your bookshelf. Bob Sutton knocks it out of the park.
Reviewed in the United States on September 13, 2017
Verified Purchase

I’m going to avoid spelling out the A word as I write this. The book is a great read. You don’t need to have read the “No A rule” to get value out of “The A Survival Guide.” There are a plethora of real world examples and tips. I particularly enjoyed the chapters on “A Avoidance Techniques” and “Mind Tricks That Protect Your Soul.” A’s could be prevalent throughout an organization. In fact, there may be one right behind you! How you deal with these people depend on where there are and how high up or down they are in the company. You have to strategize and work with your peers, accordingly. Sutton takes care to explain how being an A isn’t necessarily a permanent condition. Be cognizant of this. Don’t go Defcon 5 immediately if dealing with an A.

I liked Sutton’s observation that just distancing yourself from an A, even by 10 or 20 feet, can help reduce the toxicity of the atmosphere surrounding As. Becoming an A can be contagious. You don’t have to read the book cover to cover in one sitting, and there are times you’ll find it a great reference tool Be careful about making the book highly visible in your workspace. You don’t know when an A will wander by. Some thoughts not in the book but still important – (1) If in a meeting, you don’t recognize the A in the room, you may be the A. (2) Some music to hum if you need to tune out an A, from Willie Nelson – “Momma don’t let your babies grow up to be As…”

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118 people found this helpful

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Tameka F. Pooser-Baker
Good Product
Reviewed in the United States on March 15, 2025
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Good Product

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John Korkow
Great followup to first book
Reviewed in the United States on March 12, 2025
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Read it in a few hours--read first in series years ago, great time saver as a manager. This one has fantastic tips to deal with jerks you are stuck with.

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J. Nash
Essential Toolkit for Navigating Toxicity
Reviewed in the United States on July 22, 2024
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This book provides practical strategies for dealing with difficult people in any setting. Robert’s insights are both humorous and actionable, making it easier to maintain your sanity while confronting toxic behavior. A must-have resource for anyone looking to reclaim their peace of mind in challenging relationships.

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3 people found this helpful

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Jeremy Levitt
Not bad
Reviewed in the United States on October 6, 2017
Verified Purchase
This book was a good read, although not spectacular. The core messages were excellent, but I had to do a lot of wading through unnecessarily elaborate and long-winded stories to get to the point. Sadly, this book could have conveyed the precise same messages in about 15% of the word count. I would have preferred significantly more substance per page.

However, the underlying messages were good and based on solid research which I appreciated.

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32 people found this helpful

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Born on a Monday
Great, funny, and useful
Reviewed in the United States on May 15, 2019
Verified Purchase
OK my first review got kicked I guess for using a word from the title, so I will be more restrained this time.
I am only about 1/2 way through this book and it is so funny! He has very practical advice for dealing with the *** in your life at home, work, or just even strangers. He also wants to make sure that you are aware that you might also be an *** and what you can do about that.
It is for working for one and how to deal with it whether you leave the job, the department, or whatever you decide to do. He gives advice for helping you decide what will be best for your own well-being. And he also give advice for when the *** is a family member, a friend, or even a stranger.
I keep laughing while reading but getting great ideas. This is definitely one of my favorite books.

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8 people found this helpful

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Elvi
Very honest, practical and straightforward
Reviewed in the United States on May 26, 2023
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Perhaps, I would have liked a bit more discussions on fighting the battle when there is no way to escape. But still, very though-provoking.

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5 people found this helpful

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Jerry Stigall
is certainly one of the greatest energy drains employees can experience
Reviewed in the United States on December 8, 2017
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There are no greater toxic 'substances' in a workplace than Mr. or Ms. A. They come in all kinds of packages but wreak the same havoc in organizations everywhere on the planet. This book, along with Dr. Sutton's original work, boldly and substantively addresses an age-old problem that left alone, is certainly one of the greatest energy drains employees can experience. If executives expect a high ROI from their business investments, they need to start with creating a climate that results in a high human capital ROI. This guide will help you do that and there’s no one else realistically addressing the problem in the industry aside from Bob Sutton.

I've had more people in my office over the decades complaining about Mr. or Ms. A and all of them desperately needed a solution. I've provided a lot of guidance as well as a recommendation to read the 'A rule' and now I have another practical and applied approach from Dr. Sutton to recommend. He has done the business world a great service over the past decade and again through his newest work. It’s a must-have resource for everyone working in an organizational environment.

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12 people found this helpful

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Ana Vranes
Ok but not what I was expecting
Reviewed in Spain on December 9, 2023
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Not that insightful or helpful as I was expecting, but ok book

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Amazon Customer
Good advise for a happy working life
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 10, 2019
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Interesting and well written book. The writer expresses practice ideas about working life. Considering that everybody could bump into one of these creatures, this book will give one practical advise to deal with them.

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Dea
Excellent
Reviewed in France on January 24, 2018
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Excellent livre, un vrai plaisir à lire pour se détendre en pleine période de charrette!
Certains passages son un peu longs mais c'est tout de même assez intéressant

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Erica
Great read
Reviewed in Australia on December 9, 2024
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Essential reading if you have a toxic work colleauge.

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katgirl
a good book to validate feelings but not a lot of solutions
Reviewed in Italy on August 3, 2018
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this is a great and humour book to validate situations of workplace bullying but really, i did not find many solutions -- by the time a person is readying a book like this they have usually tried all the solutions mentioned. but getting the validation and finding humor is also important!

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3.0 out of 5 stars Ok but not what I was expecting

5.0 out of 5 stars Good advise for a happy working life

5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent

5.0 out of 5 stars Great read

4.0 out of 5 stars a good book to validate feelings but not a lot of solutions

Ok but not what I was expecting

Good advise for a happy working life

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Great read

a good book to validate feelings but not a lot of solutions