How to Deal with the Effect of Acne on Self Esteem

Co-authored by Laura Marusinec, MD

Last Updated: August 10, 2021 Approved

Acne can be a real problem, but it is worse if you let a common skin condition dictate how you feel about yourself. Spend some time identifying your thoughts and feelings related to acne and how they impact you and scrutinize the ones that are overly critical and harsh. Have compassion for yourself and recognize having physical imperfections is not a reflection on you or your core self. While you should absolutely treat your acne by seeing a dermatologist and taking care of yourself, you should also see to it that your skin does not determine what you feel about yourself.

Part 1

Part 1 of 3:

Improving Your Thoughts and Self-Esteem

1
Silence your inner critic. Often, the harshest critic comes from within. A lot of us tend to have a part of us that is critical of appearance. If you talk to yourself in an unkind way, talk back in a way a kind way--the way your best friend would, for instance.
- These types of thoughts are often “automatic,” meaning that they come into your mind against your will. It is completely normal to experience automatic thoughts. Although you can't control the thoughts themselves, you can become aware of them and consciously challenge them.^{[1]
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- If the voice says, “That person turned you down because of your acne,” say back, “Rejection hurts, but it's a normal part of being human. If this is true, then that person is silly for being so judgmental.”
- For example, a voice that says, “Nobody will want to be seen in public with you!” can be replaced with, “I know my friends value more than appearance. And there are plenty of people with all sort of imperfections outside in public right now.”
- Recognize that automatic thoughts are often irrational. If you experience an automatic thought about your acne, assess it rationally and counter it with facts. For example, if you think something like, “Nobody will ever care about me because of my acne,” stop and consider the people in your life. Chances are that there are already people in your life who care about you very much, regardless of your appearance.
2
Have compassion for yourself. If your best friend felt embarrassed or down because of acne, what would you say to them? Would you make fun of them or let them know that you cared? Be kind to yourself. Imagine if your friend came to you with their own insecurities about acne. What would you say?^{[2]
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- Instead of saying, “Poor me” or, “I'm less deserving of things because of how I feel about myself,” say, “Everyone struggles with things that make them feel vulnerable or insecure.”
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3
Recognize your humanness. There has yet to be a perfect human who is flawless in their looks and actions. Every person has shortcomings and you are not separate from that! Being human means having flaws. Instead of feeling separate from others because of your acne, recognize that you are not the only person who struggles with skin issues or problems related to your appearance.^{[3]
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- Remembering that even the most put-together person has struggles and flaws can help you recognize that you're never alone or beneath anyone. Most magazines and online celebrity photos are just touched up to cover those imperfections. Those people have flaws too, though, just like you.
4
Raise your confidence in other areas. If you feel low about yourself due to your skin, find other things to raise your self-esteem. For example, participate in a sports team or activity that you enjoy. You can increase your confidence by trying something new. Attend a dance class, go to yoga, or give meditation a shot. You can feel accomplished in trying something new and begin to build skills to improve your self-esteem.^{[4]
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- For example, learn to ice skate. While it might be scary at first, you can make new friends and build your skills each week.
5
Practice positive affirmation. Focus on your good qualities and raise your self esteem by making a list of your strengths and accomplishments. Ask a close friend or family member to help.
- Phrase each item on your list as a positive affirmation. For example: “I am a compassionate person who goes out of her way to help others.”
- Repeat these affirmations to yourself regularly. Try posting the list in a place where you can see it and read it every day. The more often you hear positive things about yourself, the more you will believe them.
6
Use mindfulness. People often want to turn away or avoid things that make them uncomfortable. You might not want to acknowledge how acne makes you feel or the suffering it causes you. Yet, reflect on the feelings you experience that relate to acne. Do you struggle to look at yourself in the mirror? Do you fear meeting new people and whether they will judge you based on your acne? Acknowledge the pain it causes you in order to more fully have compassion for yourself.^{[5]
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- Acknowledging the way you feel about your acne will likely be unpleasant or uncomfortable. However, accepting how it affects you can help you be kinder to yourself.
- Allowing yourself to experience and express negative feelings can help you begin to move past those feelings.
7
Identify other self-esteem triggers. It's unlikely that your acne is the only trigger of low self-esteem. What are other events that make you feel low? Are you particularly sensitive to how people talk to you or look at you? Do you take failure very personally? Work on identifying and raising your self-esteem in other areas outside of your skin.^{[6]
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- For example, if someone gives you feedback about a project, do you think they're being critical of you, or attacking you in some way? Recognize that people's comments may not be a personal attack on you.
If you are feeling bad about one area of your life, this can bleed over into your feelings about other aspects of your life. If you think that your feelings about your acne are starting to affect your overall self-perception, step back and look at the bigger picture. Consider all the things that make you who you are beyond the appearance of your skin.
9
Recognize that you are not alone. When you feel different from others, it can make you feel alone or isolated from others. But acne is a very common affliction. If you look at your friends and notice that you have the worst acne, you might start to feel less-than them or self-conscious because of this difference. If you feel isolated because of your acne, remember that lots of other people have acne, too. Even if you feel alone, you are not alone.^{[7]
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Mind
U.K.-based mental health charity focused on providing advice and resources to anyone facing mental health problems.

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- Some people struggle with acne in an emotional and social way while others simply carry on. Search out individuals who may have blemishes like you, but do not go and hide because of it. If they can do it, so can you.
- If you're scared to meet people or talk to people because of your acne, face your fears. Put yourself in social situations and notice that they almost always go well.^{[8]
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People typically do not post pictures that are unflattering. Often they wait until the breakout clears up, or use a lot of make-up or use Photoshop or filters to mask the imperfections. This leads to a situation in which it can look like no one ever has a bad hair day or pimples or anything, because it never gets on the Facebook feed. Too much time online feeds into a glossy fantasy of a reality in which you are the only person that has imperfections.

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Part 2

Part 2 of 3:

Coping with Your Acne

1
Treat acne at home. There are lots of acne solutions you can buy at your local pharmacy and use at home. You may start with a face wash product to target your skin type, which may be oily, dry, or a combination of both. Use a spot treatment for targeting individual breakouts or targeting areas such as the t-zone. Generally, over-the-counter products to treat acne include benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid. They are often gels or creams that you apply directly to the spots.^{[9]
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American Academy of Dermatology
Professional organization made of over 20,000 certified dermatologists

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- Some treatments are starting to use a retinoid that used to only be available by prescription. These are very effective in treating acne, and can be used in conjunction with other acne treatment products.
- These treatments may make your face especially dry at first, so adjust how much you use or include a moisturizer in your daily face care routine.
- While lots of treatment options exist, they may not all work for you. Be patient when trying out new formulas and products. Most at-home treatments take 4-8 weeks to show improvement.
2
Adopt a healthy lifestyle. Acne can be affected by things like your diet and overall mental and physical state. Foods high in fat and sugar can contribute to flare-ups, as can high levels of anxiety or stress. You can reduce your risk of breakouts and boost your overall self esteem by adopting healthy habits, such as:
- Eating a diet low in fat and sugar, and high in fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins.
- Cutting down on dairy products.
- Exercising regularly.
- Meditating to relieve stress and anxiety.
- Removing makeup and cosmetics before you exercise or go to sleep.
- Washing your face regularly, including after exercising.
3
Get medical treatment. One of the best ways to clear the effects of acne is to treat the acne. Especially if you've used all the natural remedies and over-the-counter treatments, it might be time to see a specialist. A dermatologist can assess the severity of your acne as well as potential causes and treatments. Along with prescription medications, they can look at options like laser treatment, chemical peels, and microdermabrasion. However, you may need to be patient: some treatments can take up to eight weeks to take full effect.^{[10]
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- Depending on your insurance, you may need a referral from your general provider to see a dermatologist.
4
Cover up. Some people choose to hide their acne or the redness on their face with makeup. When choosing a cover-up, make sure it says “noncomedogenic” or "non-acnegenic" on the label, which means that it won't clog your pores. Be careful of any products that go on your face and make sure they are not irritating your skin or making the acne worse. Write down a list of products you use and bring them to your dermatologist to ask if they are safe.^{[11]
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- Use oil-free and water-based products. You might cover up your acne with tinted moisturizers, sunscreen, or tinted ointment.
5
Talk about it. Having acne isn't like having the plague: it's likely other people your age have it, too. Don't be afraid to bring it up or talk about it with your friends. While it may be difficult to talk about it at first, opening up to a sympathetic friend will help you feel more comfortable addressing the issue. You might share advice or recommend products to help. Talking about your acne can be a way of bringing people together and solving a problem you're all having.^{[12]
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- For example, you can say to your friend, “I have a zit that just won't go away! Does that ever happen to you?”
6
Take care of yourself. While problems with your skin and how they affect you can feel like the center of your life, don't forget to take care of yourself. Take care of your whole body, your emotions, and your mind, not just your face. Take care of your body by eating well, exercising, and getting adequate sleep each night. Do something relaxing to help you deal with anxieties and stress.^{[13]
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- Have a healthy way to let go of stress. Try taking a daily walk, going for a run, journaling, or painting.
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Part 3

Part 3 of 3:

Getting Support from Others

1
See a supportive physician. Whether you see a dermatologist or primary care physician, it's important that you feel supported by them. See someone who is kind and sympathetic. Your physician should listen to you and respond to your concerns. Because acne affects not only your skin but also your emotions and social interactions, your physician should be willing to discuss the total impacts of acne with you.^{[14]
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PubMed Central
Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health

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- If you don't feel supported by your physician, consider changing to someone who makes you feel heard and understood.
2
Join a support group community. Join a support group for people who have acne and struggle with self-esteem. You can likely find an in-person support group in your community for people struggling with self-esteem problems, and you can find a more specific group for people who struggle with the effects of acne. Joining with other people can help you feel less alone and more supported.^{[15]
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Mind
U.K.-based mental health charity focused on providing advice and resources to anyone facing mental health problems.

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- Ask for advice, share your story and listen to other people's stories. Meeting other people who have similar struggles to your own can be comforting and relieving.
- Find a support group in your community by calling your local mental health clinic or hospital, or by looking online. If you can't find a community support group, join an online support group or forum.
3
Talk to family and friends. If you need to talk, ask someone for some time to vent or talk about how you feel. Let them know you feel insecure because of your acne. Find someone who is a good listener and who will support you, not cut you down or make fun of you. You might want advice or not want advice, so you can tell them ahead of time whether you want some help or you just want them to listen.^{[16]
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- Consider the people in your life who are trustworthy and supportive. You might not want to go to somebody who often playfully pokes fun at you or does not take you seriously.
- Think of someone who cares about you and wants to support you through your difficulties. Ask them, “Can I talk to you? I'm struggling with how I feel about myself.”
4
See a therapist. If you feel like your acne affects your self-esteem severely and you don't know how to move forward, a therapist can help. Therapy is a safe place where you can talk about your feelings without feeling judged or criticized. Your therapist can help you identify triggers and build coping skills to improve your self-esteem.^{[17]
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American Psychological Association
Leading scientific and professional organization of licensed psychologists

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- Find a therapist by calling your insurance provider or local mental health clinic. You can also get a recommendation from a physician or friend.
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