By Josh Roberts
Organize, prioritize, delegate, and get rid of unrealistic expectations about what you can and should do. Encourage the person with bipolar to develop a diverse support network, including mental health professionals, other relatives, friends, and peers. Make sure you have a support system for yourself.
As best you can, get into the habit of exercising, eating well, and getting proper rest. Pay attention to signs of depression, such as withdrawal, low energy, trouble concentrating, excessive guilt, and irritability.
Acknowledge your grief, anger, sadness, or guilt. Accept that your loved one’s bipolar will inevitably affect your family and plans for the future, and find new ways to enjoy your life.
During a period of stability, make it clear that you will walk away from symptomatic behaviors such as shouting or constant criticism. You may also wish to establish responsibilities that must be performed except in cases of severe illness.
Looking for, recognizing, and focusing on what’s good—your loved one’s courage or creativity, for example, or your own empathy and kindness—can make it easier to cope with the situation and encourage a better outlook.
Adapted from “A Guide for Caregivers of People with Bipolar Disorder.”
Printed as “Sidebar: Caregivers and Five Strategies for Self-Support”, Winter 2014
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My son has had BP for about 8years and finding the right medical professionals willing to work with him was a wait and see game. Its heartbreaking to see the trauma but am powerless. Medications have cycled him from bouncing off the walls to a zombie.
Its hard not to get entwined in the trauma and the hustle when its your loved one. How do you step away how do you not care???
I know my son has times where he feels bad but family just go day by day. But i wouldnt have it any other way, he is my moon and the stars. This is how we roll
It is like bringing up another child but it’s my husband. I’m to tired! It’s only getting worse. Meds, therapy etc….BLAH BLAH BLAH!
I feel for each & every one of you… my son was diagnosed 4 years ago. The feeling of being alive, creative & the energy they feel when manic makes it difficult for them to accept the feeling of being medicated and slowed down … my son even said he felt like a zombie & that he couldn’t feel anything that he was crying on the inside but could produce tears… finding a medication that works took us years.. and the right doctor willing to work with us. We take one day at a time..
To all the supportive caregivers, I am a 35 year diagnosed Bi-polar 1,ADHD 56 year old woman. I have been married 33 years and have a 32 year old son. I have spent months upon months in psychiatric hospitals. 26 ect’s,depressions that were so bad the doctors weren’t sure I would come back. I have now been seeing the same doctor for over 23 years. Between him and my husband any slight change is immediately noticed. I have attempted suicide on many occasions. Good part, Im now stabilized with the help of what i call my cocktail of medications and I see my doctor regularly. Life was hard to say the least for my husband and young son. I have asked my husband why he stayed with me during that long, dark period (im honestly not sure i would’ve) and he just answers because I knew you were in there. He is my rock, the knowledge that he will always be there gives me the strength to tackle each day. Mental illnesses effects everyone you love. Today they have many groups to help all ages, something they did not have for my son. Fortunately together we have learned to cope. Don’t settle, shoot for the stars, your not like the smiths next store sure,but you can have a good life. Fight for them when they can’t fight for themselves, when they can be supportive. I am praying for you all.
I have a 30 year old son with schizoaffective bipolar living with me. He has NO insight about his psychosis. He is not compliant with meds. He is loosing everything he has worked for. He is making bad choices and will likely now have some legal issues to deal with. Life can be a nightmare. I find it so hard to ” take care of myself” when there is this intense period of crises. You don’t know if they are dead or alive, or what REAL catastrophe will occur today. No one really gets it except for other families with a similar loved one. I went thru the NAMI family to family group and ti was quite helpful. These conditions are so cruel and rob our loved one and all of us of so much quality of life.