What Does It Mean To Be Gender Fluid?

Gender fluid means not having a fixed, single sense of your gender. This fluidity reflects how a person's gender identity can be something other than the conventional gender archetypes of male and female. Gender identity refers to an internal understanding of your gender, regardless of what your chromosomes, organs, or physical characteristics may indicate.

Your gender identity may or may not match your gender assigned at birth. A transgender person, for example, identifies with something other than their gender assigned at birth. A cisgender person identifies with their gender assigned at birth.

Gender fluidity can look different from person to person, and not all gender-fluid people identify in the same way. Read on to learn what gender fluidity means and how to help others understand.

What Is Gender Fluidity?

You might not identify with one gender if you are gender fluid. This identity instead reflects an unfixed gender expression. Gender-fluid people might identify with feminine, masculine, and androgynous clothing, interests, and mannerisms.

Being gender fluid means something different to each person. Your gender identity may change over time. Gender can shift over the course of a day, several weeks, months, or years. You might also feel like one gender does not wholly describe you.

"Whatever form gender fluidity takes, it is important to remember that it is a valid gender identity. It is not being flaky or 'going through a phase,'" Jo Eckler, PsyD, a psychologist based in Texas, told Health. "So many other aspects of ourselves ebb and flow and shift that it only makes sense that our gender can, too."

Other Names for Fluid

There are several terms a person who is not strictly male or female may identify with and use, including:

• Agender
• Bigender
• Genderqueer
• Non-binary

Keep in mind that not all of these terms are interchangeable. Talk to a gender-fluid person and learn what identity they prefer before labeling a person.

Gender Fluid vs. Non-Binary 

Non-binary people identify with a gender expression or identity that falls outside the gender binary of male and female. Gender fluid falls under the same umbrella as non-binary, but these are different identities. A gender-fluid person, in contrast, has a changing gender expression or identity.

Gender Fluidity vs. Sexual Fluidity

Sexual orientation, like gender identity, exists on a spectrum. Gender identity describes your internal understanding of your gender. Sexual orientation, in contrast, is your emotional, romantic, or sexual attraction to others. You might experience a changing attraction to certain people if you are sexually fluid. This umbrella term may include asexual, bisexual, pansexual, and other identities.

How Common Is Gender Fluidity?  

About 1.6% of adults in the United States identify as non-binary or transgender, but it's not clear how many people are gender fluid.

"Due to the lack of common knowledge about nonbinary and gender fluid identities, there are likely people out there who are gender fluid but don't realize that there is a name for it," said Dr. Eckler.

Fluidity in Children

It's unclear how many children identify as gender fluid, but nearly 26% of LGBTQ+ youth identify as non-binary. Children may express their gender in ways that do not match their gender assigned at birth. Some children might show signs of gender fluidity. Your child might prefer to dress in clothes and play with toys that are not consistent with any singular gender. 

Research has shown that gender-diverse children are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and self-harm than others. These children are more likely to have improved mental health outcomes when their parents accept, affirm, and support their gender identity.

What Are the Pronouns for Gender-Fluid People?

Gender fluidity typically involves shifts or changes in gender, so a person might use different pronouns. Their pronouns might depend on how they view their gender at that moment in time. Many, but not all, gender-fluid people use "they" instead of "he" or "she." Others may prefer "zie" or "Mx." It's best to ask if you are unsure.

Helping Others Understand

It might be difficult to talk to others about being gender fluid. Remember that you do not need to "come out" as gender fluid if you do not feel comfortable. However, talking to trusted friends and family might reduce stress and build a support system in which you can express yourself honestly.

Here are some tips for helping others understand gender fluidity:

• Answer questions: People might have questions about what it means to be gender fluid, especially if they do not share similar experiences. You may use this as an opportunity to explain fluidity better and dispel misconceptions.
• Be honest: Encourage an open conversation, and make sure you are comfortable sharing your emotions and feelings.
• Decide whether it's safe: It's important to consider your safety when deciding to share your gender identity with others. Make sure you talk to people who are open-minded and trustworthy. Just remember that others' opinions do not influence your internal understanding of your gender, regardless of whether they react poorly.
• Educate: You might prepare articles and resources to share with others that explain gender identity and fluidity.
• Share your pronouns: Talk to your loved ones about what pronouns you prefer, which can help affirm your gender identity.

A Quick Review

Gender fluid is one of the terms people may use to describe their gender. This term reflects a changing gender expression and identity.

Gender fluidity falls under the same umbrella as non-binary, but these terms are not always interchangeable. Being gender fluid means something different to each person. A person's gender may shift over time, or they might not feel like a singular gender identity best describes them.