1.
I'm sorry to tell you this, but dogs aren't real.
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2.
They're a figment of your imagination.
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5.
This is something from a dream.
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6.
They're CGI, they're a trick.
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7.
This lil' guy is not real. It's not possible.
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8.
DOGS AREN'T REAL, YOU MADE THEM UP.
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9.
You've imagined them because you want to live in a world in which creatures as extraordinary as dogs exist.
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11.
It's possible they were created by Jim Henson.
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12.
Or that they're a collective hallucination; Our subconscious minds making the cold reality life on earth more palatable.
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13.
OK, sure, dogs are real and so is Santa.
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14.
You're old enough for the truth now: Dogs were made up just to make you happy.
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15.
So you'd believe there is goodness in this world.
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16.
They're a fantasy to protect you from reality.
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17.
We wish they were real – just look at them – but sadly they are not.
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18.
Dogs are as real as dragons, as unicorns, as griffins.
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19.
They're mythical creatures. I'm sorry to break it to you.
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