In the last 14 years, I have had no major mood swings, episodes nor interruptions to my life due to having bipolar disorder. Yes, I do have bipolar disorder. Four of us in my family have bipolar, and my mother-in-law took her own life due to bipolar. And I understand that you might assume that I don’t have too severe of a case of bipolar since I’ve not had any major bipolar episodes in my life for the past 14 years. But, I do have it.
I find it curious that I have to defend the fact that I have bipolar disorder. But, in the past when I’ve written about living well for this length of time I’ve received comments from various readers that I must NOT have bipolar. One reader accused me of pretending to have bipolar disorder so I could make money by blogging about it. I could only wish that was true! (By the way, those of us who blog for bphope.com are not paid to blog.)
The truth is, I’ve been able to live well in spite of bipolar disorder for the past 14 years; but NOT without a LOT of work and self-care. Daily I do everything within my power to keep myself stable and living well in spite of the bipolar disorder. And I happen to believe that many of you who have bipolar disorder can, in fact, live well (stable) too. That is, to live without bipolar causing major interruptions to your daily living. You can take back your life from the monster of bipolar.
And no, that does mean that you can be “healed” from bipolar that you can get “over it.” It simply means that through hard work you can learn how to keep the bipolar monster from ruling your life.
I know that there is a mindset out “there” that we are simply victims of bipolar disorder. I don’t see it that way. The only way I end up being a victim is if I do nothing regarding managing my disorder or if I simply use it as my excuse in life.
On of the most important things I do each and every day besides taking my medicine and getting enough sleep is what I call a “self-check-in” (mindfulness). For me, it is imperative to stay self-aware of how I’m emotionally doing at all times. So, routinely I ask myself “how am I doing today?” I check in with me. See, if I don’t stay “on top” of managing the disorder, it way too fast and too easily begins to control me instead!
So, I do this every day. If my ability to live well in spite of having bipolar disorder feels at jeopardy and I feel as though I’m not doing emotionally well (stable), I ask myself the following questions which help me answer why I’m not doing well.
Once I figure out what exactly is the issue I then attempt to figure out what exactly I need to do to hold off a major mood issue or episode. And I do it no matter what.
How about you? What do you do to live well? What do you do to avoid major episodes; questions that you ask yourself?
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Thanks for writing this. After my first Bipolar type 2 episode, I went 14 years without another episode. This was without any medication or counseling. I am not advocating going without this. I went without it because I did not know I had it. I was aware that I had gone through a traumatic experience during college. The memory of it brought me shame, embarrassment, and emotional pain. It also included being completely baffled by it. I would look back at the time when “I had lost my mind” and think…”Well, I’m okay now. That has never happened to me again. I’m fine.”
But I wasn’t fine. Although I never again had a major episode, I suffered from mild to mediocre depression and a fair amount of brain fog. I would often wonder if the brain fog had something to do with “that dark time in college.” For before that time, my mental clarity was high.
I finally crashed into a major depression in which I basically relived the first experience. I went to a Christian psychologist who helped me piece together what had happened 15 years earlier. I finally pieced together that I had had something called “Bipolar 2.” I had never heard of it before and was completely amazed. It answered a lot of questions. Things finally made sense. It has taken me a number of years to acknowledge that I truly do have Bipolar 2.
I’ve been told that I can’t possibly have it because I went for years without meds and didn’t not have a problem. According to some sources, bipolar always gets worse if not treated. I’ve even been told that without meds, Bipolar 2 will turn into Bipolar 1. (It hasn’t) I was told that taking an antidepressant without a mood stabilizer never works for people with Bipolar because it will always trip a manic episode. (I’m on an antidepressant without a mood stabilizer and I am doing very well!)
The bottom line is that there is no cookie cutter case for treatment for Bipolar disorder.
Everyone is different. I stay on my bupropion. (I don’t dare go off it.) I stay active. I believe I can be well. I try to eat healthy food-whole grains and vegetables. I try to get exercise. I keep my faith in the Lord and seek after Him.
Right now, I admit that I am preaching to myself a bit because I’ve gotten a little lax during this holiday season with some of this. Time to get off the couch and go for a walk!
Thank you for writing this. I read it with two hats: I am the mother of a man who has severe bipolar and I am a rabbi and pastor for several families who deal with it. I learn so much from reading this publication! Thank you, thank you.
Very good article!
I was diagnosed with Bipolar after a second severe depression which did not respond to the usual treatment for unipolar depression. At first the Psychiatrist, a Depression specialist, tentatively proposed Lithium. However, in view of the many years which elapsed between my episodes, I concluded that at last understanding what had been happening to me and why, I ought to be able to manage my condition without medication. I have been following a similar approach to Brad, without medication, supported by my wife; and with bi-annual consultations with my Psychiatrist, who provides tips on how to refine the management of my Bipolar. I know the condition can not be cured, but given the many years between my episodes, we hope that constant vigilance may prevent a recurrence. My Psychiatrist says that the difference between me and other patients, is that when I or my wife notice the early signs of a Bipolar episode, I am able to halt its progress; generally other patients are unable to do that. I hope my experience may give help to others.
Good positive read ..I was diagnosed 3yrs ago but have known for many years but was fobbed off with seditives & chronic depression. I wake up feeling depressed most mornings, i take small dose of risperidone, having so much trouble finding an ad that works for me. have my moods stable with lithium & zopiclone to sleep.. I can’t see the light not even a glimpse. . My pdr just makes me feel worse. I go for walks to clear my mind when I can.. aniexty is so bad at times I can’t do anything. I hope & pray for me to get better but it’s not happening. How long does this take !!!