Though the owner of Pulse nightclub is still in shock, Barbara Poma is adamant about one thing — an intent to rebuild the club as a place of safety and fun for the gay, lesbian and transgender community.
How exactly it returns wasn’t known Tuesday, as the club was still a crime scene. But a memorial is a sure thing.
“Anything we would ever do would include a memorial. We are still working through our grief,” Poma said in a statement through a spokeswoman.
The club’s notion of safety was shattered in violence and death early Sunday, as a man opened fire with an assault rifle and a gun.
The bar opened in 2004 and was named Pulse in honor of Poma’s brother John, who died of AIDS in 1991 — “where he is kept alive in the eyes of his friends and family” according the club’s website, as it was before the shooting.
In terms of safety as a gay bar, much of that context comes from the idea that it was a safe place for young people exploring their sexuality to be themselves. When it opened, the world was a different place for gay people. In that year, gay marriage became legal in isolated places like San Francisco and Massachusetts, but President George W. Bush had come out firmly in support of a ban on same-sex marriage.
John Poma’s background was part of the story told on the bar’s website, even before the tragedy.
“Being raised in a strict Italian family, being gay was frowned upon. However, when John came out to his family and friends, the family dynamic transitioned from a culture of strict tradition to one of acceptance and love,” the club’s website reads.
The bar was often the first bar for a young gay or lesbian to attend in Central Florida.
“It was welcoming. As they called it, it was the heartbeat of Orlando. It was the first gay bar I went to,” said Colten Carter, 25, who worked there in 2012.
Tracy Ramos, a licensed mental health counselor in Orlando, spent the days after the shooting providing free and contracted services to victims and others at Orlando Health.
“I went to Pulse when I was a little younger,” Ramos said. “It was mostly younger people, and mostly gay, but straight people would go too.”
Ramos said he has seen the reports that the shooter Omar Mateen frequented the bar. Kevin West, another regular at Pulse, said Mateen used gay dating apps on a regular basis and even messaged him on a gay dating app, Jack’d.
Ramos said he has no information about whether Mateen was questioning his own sexuality but he has counseled many people who have become angry over conflicting feelings about sexual orientation. He said he found it tragic and ironic that Mateen may have initially seen Pulse as a safe place.
If family members deny a person’s sexual orientation and “label it as wrong, that can be exhausting, damaging and give you perceptions that what you’re feeling is bad and abnormal, and make you feel you’re disconnected from the world,” Ramos said. “If you hold it in, it can come out in anger, depression, and aggression.”
Orange County Mayor Teresa Jacobs proposed Tuesday that Pulse nightclub become a memorial to the struggles of the LGBTQ community.
“I think that it’s up to the owner of the property obviously to choose what the [future] use of the property will be but I would support any efforts to memorialize Pulse either on that site or someplace else,” Jacobs said during a commission meeting attended by a small group of LGBTQ leaders.
Like several other gay bars in Orlando, Pulse held fundraisers regularly. One of the main beneficiaries was Hope & Help, which provides services for people with HIV.
“It was always fun and always diverse. I celebrated my 32nd birthday there,” said Russell Walker, community development director at Hope & Health. “It was known for its Latin night on Saturdays.”
Now Pulse finds itself the beneficiary of fundraisers. The Hammered Lamb just north of downtown planned one Wednesday night for the staff at Pulse.
“As everyone knows of the serious tragedy that has affected not just our gay community and our Orlando community but our service industry community as well,” the Facebook page for the event said.
Another informal group of friends in the bar and entertainment industry sold 500 T-shirts for a $20 minimum in a few hours Monday before a large downtown vigil. Blazoned with “1 Pulse” and other slogans, hundreds of the T-shirts were visible.
“We all know each other, and we all wanted to find a way to support each other,” said one of the T-shirt’s organizers, Jeff Coe, a manager at Gilt Nightclub.
Sara Brady, the spokeswoman for Pulse and Poma, said offers to help rebuild have been overwhelming.
“They are offering money, offering to help rebuild, offering to create artwork,” Brady said. “It is amazing and extensive. We’ve said thank you and we welcome all support, but we are not officially sanctioning anything at this point, and we can’t.”
Reporter Steve Hudak contributed; pbrinkmann@orlandosentinel.com
