Overwatch Cosplayers Critique Overwatch Porn

In case you haven’t heard by now, Overwatch porn is big. Search in the right corners of the Internet, and you’ll find sticky mountains of the stuff. The question on, well, somebody’s mind: what do people who like to pretend they are these characters think?

Cosplay stunt mastermind D Piddy put four cosplayers—Kadu Out as Lucio, Vivid Vision as Tracer, Mandee Sim as D.Va, and Monica as Reaper—in front of an Overwatch porn sizzle reel and let the good times roll.

Predictably, the viewing session began with a lot of awkward laughter. Over time, however, they got excited to see their own characters on screen, you know, banging each other. But not excited like that.

Advertisement

Then came the Big Questions: How is D.Va’s suit off and on at the same time? Why does Mercy wear her wings when she’s otherwise completely nude? How do her wings move? (“Strong butt,” replied Out, matter-of-factly.)

Advertisement

They also made some pretty astute observations.

“Those squats,” said Vision, watching Widowmaker give, um, something a very involved full-body fucking.

Advertisement

“That’s how you get that butt,” replied Sim.

“That’s how you do squats,” added Out.

So there you go: the 100 percent accurate, no-embellishments origin of Widowmaker’s butt, as told by Tracer, D.Va, and Lucio.