Migraine and Suicide: Clearly, It’s Not Just a Headache

Few people truly understand the risky relationship between migraine and suicide. One survivor explains how to find hope and cope with chronic pain and depression.

Those of us with migraine disease know that a migraine attack is not just a bad headache that will pass by morning. But not everyone in our world understands that, and even fewer people might recognize the relationship between migraine and suicide.

Migraine often comes with anxiety, depression, and bipolar disorder, all of which can overload someone with migraine who is already emotionally stressed. Unfortunately, suicidal ideation (thinking about, considering, or planning suicide) is often a product of migraine attacks.

I understand this relationship all too well. On the two occasions when I attempted suicide, I remember feeling that everyone else would be better off without me in their lives.

I was traumatized, exhausted, and depressed from unrelenting emotional and physical pain. I just wanted it to end. Those were very difficult times, and migraine was a big part of them. The guilt tore at my conscience every minute of the day. Since those attempts, regular counseling and being on an antidepressant have kept me in a much healthier state of mind.

While suicide and migraine are both quite prevalent, people with migraine are at much higher risk.

• Suicide was the 12th-leading cause of death in the United States based on the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) WISQARS leading causes of death reports in 2020.
• It is estimated that over 39 million people in the United States and 1 billion people globally have migraine, which is the second-leading cause of disability worldwide.
• In a 2019 Taiwanese study on associated suicide risk among migraine patients with and without aura, chronic migraine with aura was linked to higher risks of suicidal ideation and suicide attempts compared with those with migraine with no aura.

Suicide can seem like the only way out when one is experiencing constant debilitating pain with no successful treatment. It’s very common for those of us whose life consists of these daily migraine attacks to feel like we’re at a loss. We feel beat up, chewed up, and spit out by chronic migraine. Hopelessness often can creep into our daily thoughts.

Although some people with migraine may have a strong support system, many do not. And since we suffer from an invisible illness — we look like healthy, normal people to everyone else — it makes dealing with it that much harder. We begin to feel transparent.

'I Feel Like a Burden to Those I Love'

Migraine to me is a misunderstood burden that I carry, which makes depression and anxiety ever more prevalent. Although I have tremendous support from my family and the migraine community, I still feel incredibly isolated and alone. More than that, I feel like a burden to those I love. Not being able-bodied or having the ability to show up in my life the way I want to fosters feelings of frustration, exhaustion, and defeat.

Over the years I have found myself up at night in pain and tears, feeling like there is no way that I can go through another day like this. I feel tired, worn out, and used up. It does become a challenge sometimes to push through those feelings, and it gets harder when I feel bombarded by every emotion a human being is capable of feeling.

Having migraine and depression — two very stigmatized diseases — is a very hard and heavy burden to carry for someone with support and treatment options. Imagine what it feels like for someone without a support system or access to therapies and treatments to help manage these illnesses and to live with so many misconceptions and stigmas daily.

What Is Stigma?

William Young, MD, neurologist at the Jefferson Headache Center in Philadelphia, and immediate past president of the Alliance for Headache Disorders Advocacy, defines stigma as "an established construct … that describes a characteristic, trait, or diagnosis that is used to discredit an individual and leads to prejudice, discrimination, and loss of status. It can also be described as a process that spoils the identity of the stigmatized individual."

Unfortunately, stigma plays a large role in both migraine and mental illness.

Migraine Stigma

• People living with migraine represent one of the most stigmatized groups in society.
• People with migraine are seen as complainers, hypochondriacs, weaklings, or lazy.
• Migraine stigma in the workplace is real: More than half of Americans say they miss work or school due to migraine or headache. But only 42% of those who miss work tell their bosses or supervisors that migraine is the cause of calling in sick.
• People often think of migraine as “just a headache.”
• According to a 2010 study presented by the American Headache Society, people with chronic migraine face more stigma than those with episodic migraine and those with epilepsy, multiple sclerosis, and stroke. This stigma can lead to depression, anxiety, lower quality of life, and disruption of social relationships.

Mental Illness Stigma

• There is a lack of understanding about mental illness by family, friends, colleagues, or others you know.
• People sometimes assume that someone with a mental health condition is unstable, violent, or dangerous.
• Health insurance sometimes doesn’t adequately cover expenses associated with mental illness.
• Although major depressive disorder (MDD) is the most common mood disorder, it is largely misunderstood.

I’ve been riding the constant emotional roller coaster of pain for over 40 years and have been given false hope time and time again. The idea of putting my body or mind through more unsuccessful treatments for migraine exhausts me. It’s daunting to feel as if there will never be a long-term treatment for me.

Still, I go on. I continue to go to counseling and take an antidepressant for my depression and anxiety. I stick with the migraine treatments that provide me with a better quality of life.

Am I at a place where I don’t feel burdened by my illnesses? No, I am not. Every day is a struggle to balance depression, anxiety, and daily migraine. My biggest resources are giving myself grace on the days I am not well enough to function and using the tools I have learned over the years that help me cope in healthy ways.

Existing is hard, and there are days when I feel defeated. Knowing that I can talk with my therapist and have open conversations with my friends and family about how I feel makes it feel less suffocating.

Chronic Pain and Suicidal Thoughts

Suicide is a very real possibility for people who are suffering with chronic pain conditions like migraine, and more people should talk about it. Studies show that people with migraine disease are three times more likely to be depressed, and a correlation has been found between migraine and increased suicide rates. Having those feelings of suicidal ideation is nothing to be ashamed about. It’s when you don’t speak about it that it becomes a very dangerous reality.

I know because I have been there. You can read more about my last suicide attempt at "Almost Dying." If you are a suicide attempt survivor, you can find help and support through the American Association of Suicidology.

To learn more about the comorbidity of migraine, major depressive disorder (MDD), and suicide, please read my blog post "Stigma of Migraine and Suicide."

The last thing that most people expect is that they will run out of reasons to live. But if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts, you need to know that you’re not alone. Just in 2021, 12.2 million adults reported having serious thoughts about suicide. In sharing my story, I hope that it helps to remove the shame and stigma of attempting suicide and potentially saves some lives.

I’m sure that there are many people out there who have attempted suicide or thought about it but are ashamed to talk about it. Just know that you aren’t alone. Know this: We see you and we understand you. Stay strong, fight, and keep your eye on the light at the end of your tunnel, no matter how small it may be.

If you’re feeling suicidal, seek help as soon as possible by contacting a mental health professional or calling 911. You can also call, text, or chat 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline to be connected with a trained counselor. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) will still be available indefinitely as a resource.