We miss Steve Ballmer.
Last month, Big Steve stepped down as Microsoft CEO, and although we have few qualms with his successor, Microsoft veteran Satya Nadella, no one could ever match the enthusiasm Ballmer brought to the job. In fact, calling it enthusiasm doesn't quite do it justice.
Ballmer risked death by perspiration just to show the world's software developers how much he loved them. He threw chairs across his office when key Microsoft engineers jumped ship for Google. And he hawked Microsoft's wares in shamelessly hyper ways that eclipsed even the most desperate of late-night public access pitchmen.
Take the classic video Ballmer shot after the 1985 release of Windows 1.0, the company's first foray into an operating system with a graphical user interface. You can see it below. But you might want to turn down the volume, and maybe the brightness too. Big Steve gets loud. And so do his clothes.
"How much do you think this advanced operating environment is worth?!" Ballmer screams, before screaming some more. "Wait just one minute before you answer! Watch Windows integrate Lotus 123 with Miami Vice!" We're not quite sure what this means, and the little dance he does afterwards only confuses the matter even more. But that's not all you get! With this advanced operating system, Big Steve hollers, you also get Windows Write, Windows Paint, the MS-DOS executive, an appointment calendar, a clock, a control panel, and -- "can you believe it?!" -- Reversi!
"How much did you guess?" he asks, before waving greenbacks at the camera. "$500?! $1000?!! Even more?!!" Well, you're wrong. It can all be yours for only $99. "It's an incredible value, but it's true!" Ballmer screams, reaching a pitch so high it hurts.
The reality was that Windows 1.0 barely even ran on the painfully slow PCs of the day, and it paled in comparison to the Apple Macintosh, which had arrived a year earlier. But such inconvenient realities never softened Steve's unique brand of get up and go. Nothing did. Ever. Fifteen years later, Microsoft released Windows XP, and Ballmer was at it again. Same scream. Same dance moves. Same everything. You can see this below too.
Go ahead. Watch it. We know you miss him as much as we do.
