How to Get Away With Murder recap: Skanks Get Shanked

Two is twincest, three's a crowd.

Image
Photo: Mitch Haaseth/ABC

This week your regular HTGAWM recapper, Marc Snetiker, is out, so I will be recapping in his absence. I know that Bonnie is no replacement for Annalise, but while Marc is out this week, presumably laying on the ground, tending to a gunshot wound, audibly gasping “HOW ARE THEY GOING TO GET AWAY WITH THIS MURDER?” there is work to be done. Let’s put our asymmetrical pixie cuts together and be the best Bonnies we can be this week.

Nia Lahey’s special favor

It’s four weeks before the stomach shooting, and Annalise is going full Meredith Grey and attempting to nap under water. She’s suddenly interrupted by a phone call from Nate, or at least a phone call from Nate’s phone. Instead, it was Nate’s cancer-ridden wife, Nia, which is the worst kind of interruption when you’re taking a bath nap.

Annalise visits her, and Nia asks what kind of woman can sleep with a dying man’s wife and whether Annalise loves Nate. Annalise can’t answer: maybe because she lacks emotion or maybe because Annalise has a little bit of love for everyone. That’s when Nia goes all in and grabs Annalise’s hand and asks her to kill her.

In reality, she doesn’t need Annalise to do the job. She just needs her to get the pills that will allow her to do it herself. Annalise pretends that she doesn’t have access to that (lies, girl), but Nia begs and tells Annalise that she owes her. And if she doesn’t owe her or Nate, she should do it for herself. Annalise said she’ll try, but she can’t promise anything.

Frank gets her the pills, and when she runs into Nate, she keeps her word to Nia to not say anything about the plan. Annalise makes it back to Nia and tells her that she’s thought about killing herself a lot — even as a child. She explains that if she deserves to live, so does Nia. Nia then says, “I thought you’d do it. You’ve killed before.” It’s dripping with the threat of a setup, but Annalise simply says, “I’m not the woman you think I am.”

Friends don’t let friends kill friends

Annalise gets called in on a new case for a girl named Zoe Mitchell. She seems like a nice girl — a teenager who just likes to hang out with her best friend and a couple other girls who sometimes like to single out the first and stab her 52 times. What keeps her from being a total sweetheart is that Zoe admits to it outright.

Annalise is so distracted by Nia’s request that she struggles in focusing on the case at hand. But the real issue is that Zoe’s friends come up to her and tells her that she’s a slut, which is like… totally not chill to hear from your homicidal besties.

WANT MORE? Keep up with all the latest from last night’s television by subscribing to our newsletter. Head here for more details.

Laurel, continuing to be the smartest girl in class, steals Zoe’s phone, and shows Frank that Zoe and friends took a video imitating the super casual murder of their friend. Annalise takes the video to Zoe’s mother, as one should always do when someone’s daughter records a fake slaughter. They decide to delete it and any other copies of the video, but it surfaces anyway, and Zoe’s parents are anything but excited about it.

Annalise watches the video over and over, listening to Molly snarl, “Skanks get shanked!” High school seems hella difficult these days, and Annalise picks up on that. She picks at Molly until she starts to cry and blame Zoe, and that’s when Zoe loses her damn mind. She screams, “You were just a stuck-up bitch who was nothing without me. You’re just a basic bitch who should watch her back, because you’re next whore,” which has to be the most aggressive use of “basic bitch” outside of a Ryan Murphy show. Zoe is 100-percent guilty.

The struggle of Saint Connor

Connor isn’t particularly a noble character, but he’s definitely no stranger to struggling with the moral implications of defense law, and by defense law, I mean aiding and abetting in all kinds of murders. As Murder Inc. hops deeper into the case of the week, Connor likens Annalise to a mean girl, which isn’t entirely inaccurate. She’s the Zoe of the group, except they don’t make videos about it, ya know?

When Annalise decides to delete Zoe’s video, Connor cracks and admits that he can’t just stand aside and let a violent murderer go — the next day, the deleted video makes its way to the courtroom. Eventually, it comes to light that Connor was the one who sent the video to the ADA. Annalise takes him to task and reminds him that Sam’s blood is in his car and that Connor is only safe because Annalise keeps him safe. You can mess with a lot of people, pumpkin, but not Annalise. Praying for Connor…for all kinds of reasons, really.

NEXT: Bonnie’s big reveal

Two is Twincest, Three’s a Crowd

Annalise sends Michaela to talk to Caleb because she has boobs. Michaela interrogates Caleb about the night, and he maintains that him and his sister slept through the entire night. After some back and forth, Caleb admits that he’s in love with Catherine and they do want to be together — yes, they’re adopted, but it’s still Twincest 2015. But when Michaela comes back to Murder Inc., she defends Caleb and shrugs off a question about whether she’d be interested in him because she’s with Levi.

Back at the questioning, Michaela questions Catherine, who is very cavalier about how effective her sleeping pills were on the night of her parents’ murder. Michaela calls out Catherine’s love for Caleb, and then Catherine calls out Michaela’s crush on Caleb. No one is letting Michaela slide this week, guys. Michaela finally comes up with something noteworthy for the case: Catherine claims to be a virgin. Although I’m unsure of what a modern-day virginity test is, Catherine takes it, and for once, someone told the truth. Catherine is a virgin, and Michaela didn’t even use her boobs to find that out. As for what she’s feeling for Caleb…that’s a little trickier.

No Love for Bon-Bon

Bonnie just can’t find love, y’all. She calls up Asher to check on him, but he’s sick. He even has a super convincing cough. Fortunately, the ADA Sinclair and an unnamed man are there to make sure he’s okay. He follows them into an office, unknowingly dropping further and further down in the Keating 5 ranks.

But as the night goes on and Asher departs ADA Sinclair, Asher leans in and gives that man from before a hearty hug. The kind of hug you give your dad, and it makes sense because that’s who this man appears to be. After he leaves, Bonnie appears out of the shadows of the parking garage and asks him what he’s doing. Asher explains that he knows everything that happened with Sam’s murder, but Bonnie throws him for a loop and admits that she was the one that killed Sam, making her the most loyal ride or die ever.

Wes knows best

After Michaela returns from Caleb’s interrogation and admits how much she likes Levi, Wes quietly loses it, as Wes often does. He storms out and visits Levi to remind him that he needs to leave Michaela alone. Levi reveals some pretty important information, though: Frank called three people the night of Rebecca’s murder. One of those people is Bruno, who works at the cemetery where Rebecca’s body is allegedly dumped.

Wes relays the information to Nate as quickly as he’s able to, and Nate immediately questions Wes’ judgment. After all, the information did come from Rebecca’s foster brother. From a distance, Annalise sees Wes and Nate chatting, which leads us to the most updated information we have on…

The Night of the Fancy Mansion

At the Night of the Fancy Mansion, authorities have finally showed up to transport Annalise to the hospital. They leave ADA Sinclair’s body behind, like a cockroach you stepped on but are too grossed out by to actually pick up. Poor ADA Sinclair. Back on the road, Nate is driving Murder Inc. away from the crime scene. It’s the most over-staffed Thelma and Louise escape of all time.

In between super jerky shots of Annalise in the ambulance (if this is what it’s like to ride in an ambulance, just let me die), Murder Inc. and Nate pull over in the car and stop. Nate says that they’ll all be okay — reason being that he is with them and he knows what he’s doing. Nate asks Michaela if she’s got this, and she gets out of the car. She walks up to what appears to be Wes’ apartment and opens it up. In the shadows, Caleb appears and asks, “How is she?” and with a smile, Michaela responds, “Good.”

Quote of the Week

“Spank me daddy!” —Michaela to Levi

And with that, we come to a rocky finish and a lot of questions. How far will Bonnie go to protect Annalise? Just how close are Nate and Wes? What self-respecting person has an apartment that has only one lock? How many stabs does it take to cross the line between girlish fun and premeditated murder? And most of all “HOW ARE THEY GOING TO GET AWAY WITH THIS MURDER?” Next week, Marc returns to guide you through. As for me, you can find me lingering in the back of a parking garage, taking one for the team.

Related Articles