1.
[on first date with JK Rowling] JK: I've already told you twice I can't get you into Hogwarts. It's not even real. ME: Did you just wink
2.
Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I'm shaking hands with Dumbledore, I've won the House Cup.
3.
when i read harry potter in school i identified with harry, but now reading it as an adult, i fear i may be the girl who cries in the toilet
4.
kylie jenner bought a house at 17?? harry potter saved the wizarding world and destroyed voldemort at 17
5.
ME: any advice DAD: its ok to embellish a little [later at job interview] INTERVIEWER: tell me about yourself M: i wrote harry potter
6.
I don't care if Voldemort kills them all, I just want a version of HP where Hermione refuses to do Ron and Harry's homework for them
7.
Top 3 things Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley aren't good at: 1 Naming children 2 Naming children 3 Naming children
8.
My phone changed the word "horcruxes" to "hot dudes" like it wishes I were cool and popular and not an adult tweeting about Harry Potter.
9.
[reading Harry Potter] Me: Do you know what's going on? 3-year-old: He went to lizard school. I'd correct her, but her version is better.
10.
"Avada kedavra!" shouted Voldemort, instantly killing Lily Potter and her infant son. The End --George R.R. Martin's Harry Potter
11.
I look like Harry Potter if instead of going to wizard school, he just kept living under the stairs
12.
*jk rowling wakes up* what’s today’s tweet *spins large bingo cage* hagrid… is… pansexual and… he later joined isis
13.
[harry potter pulled over drunk driving] HARRY: expecto patronum. pretend u were driving [stag gets behind the wheel] STAG: u have a problem
14.
J.K. Rowling: "Theres actually a goat with Harry Potter the entire time, its just never mentioned or does anything."
15.
Don't worry if you peaked in high school. So did Harry Potter
16.
HER: I thought we could go all the way tonight? ME [smiling]: Only if you're ready *nervously puts on 7th Harry Potter movie*
17.
how did harry potter get down the hill? walking jk rowling